


Yuwin space

by fandomtrashheap



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Autism, Autism Spectrum, Breakup, Fashion designer Sicheng, I'm really hungry man, Johnny is a good egg, M/M, Maybe HAppy ending, Mentions of Smut, Model Sicheng, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Ouch, Photographer Yuta, Ramadan, Sad Sicheng, Sad Yuta, love my kids, no I'm not kidding, sometimes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-22
Updated: 2018-11-05
Packaged: 2018-11-17 22:57:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 41
Words: 36,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11278506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fandomtrashheap/pseuds/fandomtrashheap
Summary: Just a place for my Yuwin one shots





	1. Almost there

**Author's Note:**

> Since Ramadan is almost over I decided why not.

"Sicheenngg." Yuta said before flopping onto the said boy. "Yuttaaa."

"Please." Sicheng smiled at him and kissed his nose. "Sorry love , but I can't you know the rules. " 

"You can do it after sunset, I looked it up. " 

"Maybe but it'll be worth it when it is all over." Yuta sighed before bringing his lips close to Sicheng before the younger put a finger to his lips. "Nope."

"You are a horrible boyfriend. "

"Love you too." Sicheng replied just as Johnny walked in. "Sup ?" He said , plopping down by the pair. "Sicheng is ripping me of privileges. "

"Yuta is being a whiny shit." Sicheng slapped a hand over his mouth as soon as he uttered the word. Yuta knew the rule  _'No cursing because peace and stuff.'_ or that's how it sounded when Sicheng explained it. Sicheng closed his eyes and Yuta knew he made a silent prayer. Johnny hit Yuta after Sicheng was done and Yuta didn't say anything knowing he deserved it. "Sorry , didn't mean to push you . Happens a lot it seems." 

Sicheng gave him a hug before ruffling his hair. "It's fine , it was just one time." The way he said it was strained. Yuta grabbed his hand and kissed it, "Still sorry." Johnny hit Yuta again and Yuta glared at him. " Okay the first one makes sense but why did you hit me again? That's called rudeness." Johnny smiled. "I just felt like it. I'm leaving , you can continue being sappy little boys." 

Johnny so would've cursed and said  _shits_ any other moment, but on these days everyone in the dorms attempts to not curse . At least attempt to when Sicheng wasn't around. "I love you Nakamota Yuta. " Sicheng said kissing his head . "I love me too. " Sicheng rapped knuckles against his head. "You want to be cute and romantic but you pull little things like this."

"Well you give me the opportunity so this is really your fault and why is everyone hurting me today?" Yuta rubbed his head for emphasis. 

"Hold out Yuta , just two more days." 

"As soon as this is over I'm going to keep you in the dorm room the entire day. '

* * *

 

 

Yuta was true to his words. Perks of them having more stamina than average people. After Ramadan however , both of them had a lot extra built up. They were on their third "last round" when Sicheng's eyes welled with tears. "Oh God Yuta don't stop. Fuck,  _please._ " Yuta smirked , " What happened to the Sicheng who didn't curse ?"

"Fuck you , that was yesterday. Now. don't . Stop." Yuta thrusted into him , making Sicheng arch up. "Yuta Yuta Yuta ." The younger chanted before coming onto him. "Aish , sticky . Move over and let me get tissues. " Sicheng grabbed the tissues and cleaned up the elder before kissing his lips. 

"How long has it been since we've kissed or done this?" 

"Go at it like a billion times in a row? Probably once after the release of Cherry Bomb." Yuta laughed. "No , kissed or done  _this ._ " 

"30 days love." Sicheng replied before falling into bed . Yuta cradled his arms around him , peppering little kisses across his face and chest. "Do not ever make me go through 30 days without this again. You know we could've kissed the entire time."

"That was me being mean." Yuta said nothing but squeezed him tighter. "Yuta , too tight." 

"That's what you get babe. Don't make me go that long without kisses again." 

"You'll be getting kisses everyday , then we'll get to do this all again."


	2. Same time same place

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyday for the last two months he's been at the same place , at the same time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> None of these are connected unless stated otherwise! So this has nothing to do with lovely Ramadan Sicheng

Yuta was doing overtime , he hated overtime. Yes of course for the reasons of I can't go home yet but also because of the this dude. 

He was a street performer who had been at the same place for the past two months. Always the same time , starting about fifteen minutes after Yuta got out of work. He was a dancer most of the time, but would sometimes play guitar and hummed softly to the tune of his songs.

Yuta was sure that he had a name, he just didn't know it. He settled on calling him Win-win, for it was on his guitar case. Did Yuta mention he played guitar? Because he played amazingly. He would give anything to hear him sing.

His boss wanted  _him of all people_ to sit and do overtime with no pay. In his mind he groaned but sat back in his chair. After all , the faster he got done, maybe he could catch the end of Win-win's performance. Yuta had done the math , it takes him five minutes to walk to the park not counting the three it takes to pack his bag. He's been every performance since Win-win had gotten here and wasn't missing one now.

Five minutes later his co-worker and best friend Johnny came over to him. "Not now Seo I need to get this over with."

"I know , that's why I'm taking over for you. "

"I said not no- what? You never do anything nice for me, are you sick? " Johnny laughed. "No I'm fine. Go see your mysterious street performer ." Yuta shoved his shit into his bag which saved him two minutes. "Thanks man."

"No problem. It gave me a weird feeling to see you sad."

"That's called a conscience. "

"I hate it, now go before I change my mind. " Yuta left the room and headed to the elevators. When he finally got on one he took a deep breath , he always hated elevators but now they were making him worse. 

"C'mon c'mon c'mon. " Yuta chanted, everything seemed to be slower right now. When the elevators opened he walked quickly out his building . He then stopped and let out an external groan.

This is the difference five minutes makes in Seoul.

In five minutes people were everywhere, biking, pushing their way through the crowd. In five minutes rush hour was creating traffic on the sidewalks and streets, the main reason Yuta got to work earlier was so he could avoid all of this. When he got to the park Win-win had already started. It took him nine minutes to get here because of people and their tendencies to be slow , plus already being late from overtime. So 18 minutes late, Win-win normally only performs for 20. At least Yuta could catch the end.

Yuta saw some people who came often , but not as often as him. There was a girl and her father who came on Tuesdays , and the teenager who obviously thought Win-win  was cute. She had hit on him twice, and been turned down twice. She still came on Tuesdays and Thursdays, because who couild resist the pretty boy in front of them? 

Win-win's eyes scanned the crowd before landing on Yuta. Not like he was looking and made eye contact for a second, but for a long ass time (euhehhe). Win-win smiled at him before picking up his guitar and sitting down. He began to play a song that Yuta loved , infact he was putting words to it in his head. Win-win didn't always play this song , but when he did it made Yuta feel like being wrapped up in a blanket. It felt safe. 

It felt like love.

 

 

When Win-win finished his performance Yuta gathered the courage to go up to him and figure the basics out. Like his job, his age , and his  _actual fucking name._ Then he took a breath and walked up to the boy. Win-win looked up at him and damn. Yuta was hit with the feeling train . Win-win's eyes were perfectly almond shaped with chocolate brown irises that had specks of amber in them. He was sweating slightly still (alliteration , point english class) ,and his mouth was slightly parted and breathing heavily. He really was a sight.

Yuta composed himself before speaking , "Hi I'm-" 

"Yuta I know. I'm not a stalker or anything! I just overheard your friend say it one day about a month ago. Thanks for coming though , I was worried you weren't gonna make it."

"I got out of work late and then the rush happened so.."

"Aish that sucks. You're my good luck charm so I don't think I did as good as usual." Yuta felt his ears grow hot. "Me? Why?"

"You've been at every show since I started doing this little thing after work so I would focus on you before each performance for like a second. Hope it didn't weird you out."

"No," Yuta said a little too quickly , "I mean no not at all. It's sweet for you to think that..."

"Dong Sicheng, pleasure to really meet you Yuta."

"It's nice to know you're real name , I've been calling you Win-win for the last two months."

"Oh so you talk about me?"

"Only to that friend of mine , Johnny. He took up my overtime work so I could come today."

"You owe him. " Sicheng said while putting up his guitar. "I liked the last song you played. The one with the guitar."

"I know. You always look different when I play it , like you're in love with the music." 

 _Or the person behind the music._ Sicheng blushed at him. "I said that out loud didn't I?"

"Yep."

"Can we forget that?" The other boy rolled his eyes. "Are you even legal? " Yuta questioned . Sicheng really did look like the type you'd have to ask the first time you meet. He was either 15 or 25 you couldn't tell.

"Yes , don't say anything about my face. I know I look five but I am actually 24" Yuta laughed softly. "I'm 26 ."

"Not such a bad age gap."

"Not at all." They didn't even establish an official relationship and they're talking about age gaps? "My place or yours?" Yuta asked. 

"Neither. You take me on a proper date and then you may give me kisses." This was nice, someone who didn't fuck before the first date. "So when do I get access? "

"Around the third month or so . And you still wouldn't be able to get into my pants , maybe a blowjob or something. After that we can talk about total access."

"Fair enough, " Yuta smiled at him and linked hands. "You didn't say anything about hands."

"Fair enough." Sicheng mimicked.

Yuta scooted closer to him and the younger put his head on his shoulder. "How about I get the first date out of the way and take you for ice cream tonight? "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thinking about making this a full on series , comment if you would read it


	3. Montage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On Saturdays Yuta takes pictures at a local market , on Saturdays Sicheng shops at the local market. Sicheng is also a model with flair , but sometimes the simplest pictures were the most beautiful

Yuta loved Saturdays more than he loved ice cream. On Saturdays he would go to this amazing outdoor market and take pictures, not for work , just for fun. Everytime he went he would see one of his models Sicheng who was known for his daring pictures and his eccentric clothes. Sicheng was a fashion designer who also wore his line with pride, and only Yuta took the pictures.

It was quite a surprise seeing him the first time. Yuta was just setting his camera up when Sicheng was in front of him. "Yuta? What are you doing here?" He knew the answer , and was coming over to him. "Why take pictures here?"

"It's different really. No one posing , no one trying to look their best. Just normal families, normal people , it's something most photographers don't really pay attention too. The most beautiful things in life are sometimes the most simple." Sicheng looked at him, "That was the most deep thing you've ever said to me." And went back to shopping. He looked different, Yuta hadn't seen him looking this peaceful in the two years he's known him. That being said most of their interactions had been short and all the words they said to eachother were , "Good. Good. Turn, that perfect. Just like that." You know, photographer to model things.

_click_

Sicheng slowly turned to face Yuta, who was slowly lowering his camera , and apologetic look on his face. "I'm so sorry , photographer habit . I'll delete it."

"Let me see it."

"What?"

"You heard me," Sicheng held out his hand, "Show me the picture." Yuta reluncantly held out his camera and Sicheng looked at the picture. "I wasn't ready , but it looks like I was. "

"I told you , best pictures come from simple things." Sicheng looked at the picture one last time , "Print this out for me, I want to see it next time we do a shoot."

"Be back next Saturday? " Sicheng just smirked and walked into he crowd . 

 

Sicheng was back next Saturday, and the next , and had been to the market for quite some time . Both boys long since lost count.

 

Sicheng gave a scrunched up face as Yuta snapped another picture. "I have at least one million pictures of you like that."

"Then why do you keep saving them?"

"...No comment." Sicheng rolled his eyes and picked up an apple , "Red or green?"  _click._ "Red duh." 

"How many?" 

"I don't know , how many do we eat?"  _click._ "If I knew do you think I'd be asking Nakamota Yuta? " They walked to a different booth before stopping again so Yuta could take more pictures of things. A family walking past , a bird's nest , the cashier , then Sicheng again. He had just looked up from his phone when Yuta snapped the picture, perfect timing for Yuta. "Aiyo! I wasn't ready!"

"And has that ever stopped me before?" Yuta gave him the camera to peek at the picture. Sicheng's eyes were slightly over the phone looking into whoever was lookings eyes. His lips were pursed as they always were when he was on his phone . "Let me guess , print it out?" Yuta said as he got his camera back. "Of course. You know me so well." As they walked to the cashier , a small tug was felt on Yuta's shirt.

A girl no more than five was looking at him with wide eyes. "Excuse me Mr.Man , but I saw you taking pictures and can your take one of me?" Yuta bent down to her height, "What's your name sweetie?"

"Jinlee."

"Well Jinlee I'd love to, but you need to go ask you mama or papa before I take a picture." Jinlee nodded and scampered off, coming back with her mother behind her. "Hi , I'm Jinlee's mother . You said you would take a picture of her? "

"Yes ma'am , if it was alright with you of course." The woman nodded and picked her daughter up and they both smiled brightly. "Okay One , two , three!"  _click , and click._ Yuta had a couple pictures of the family. The mother looked at them and smiled before giving him her e-mail address. "Send them to me please , how much do I owe you?" 

"None ."

"You can't be serious, I have to give you some sort of pay." Yuta shook his head , "No money, but if you ever need pictures done again I'd be happy to take them. I have a little sister your daughters age as well." 

"Jinlee do you think we should let Mr.."

"Nakamota Yuta. "

"Mr. Yuta take pictures for us?" Jinlee nodded vigorously and hugged him "Thank you."

"Anytime , have a nice day!"

"You too!" Yuta turned back to Sicheng . "Please tell me you've got all the stuff paid for. Sicheng rolled his eyes again , "We only bought like three things. "

"You've done this before and ended up staying for at least an extra twenty minutes ."

"In my defense... okay , so I don't have any defense. It was one time!"

"Lets just go home."

 

* * *

 

When they got to their apartment they unlocked the door when Sicheng stopped short. "Yuta."

"Hm?"

"We forgot the fucking apples." 


	4. In love with a ghost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Based off the title of a lofi song , the summary is the title
> 
>  
> 
> In love with a ghost but we've never met , can we have a coffee or something?

Yuta woke to the sound of windchimes , inside , where the air didn't blow unless it was Tuesday. On Tuesday Yuta had to get up earlier and his normal alarm clock hates him and it's too much work to have to change it so he settled for his ghost. Yep. Nakamoto Yuta has a lively ghost.

The ghost doesn't really talk to him though , he just likes helping him. Like he makes his bed and cleans the house when Yuta gets home late. Oh! And he writes out to do lists. He's a very sweet ghost , but Yuta has never met him. Well they live in the same space but they don't talk , Yuta announces his presence because he forgot to once and his ghost broke a flowerpot. They know alot about eachother , though. His ghost knows that he's forgetful, he likes to wear casual stuff like all the time, and he can't go two minutes without doing something stupid.

Yuta knows his ghost can sleep and enjoys doing it , likes black coffee and that vanilla bean thing from Starbucks . He's very productive and balances out Yuta . He likes to watch Supernatural for some reason, and is Chinese. (The subs were Chinese down the screen) . They work pretty well seeing his ghost doesn't need food and sleeps wherever. Yuta just assumes it's a he , it could be a girl , he's never seen it. 

The one slight problem is his ghost doesn't understand privacy . I mean , it was worse in the beginning.

Like a week after Yuta found out he had a ghost he realized he needed to set ground rules . He was taking a shower and his ghost opened the door , Yuta had explained that while he was taking a shower no one could come with him , but it takes ghosts a little longer to understand concepts so Yuta had locked the door one night.

Long story short he had to buy a new door , and explain that normal people locked doors. (He lost a flowerpot for that.) Now it's the occasional almost peek or he feels him watching while he sleeps. Which is just creepy on a couple levels.

 

 

Today Yuta had an idea though. Today he was going to talk him, or at least try to. He had gotten out of work late and spent extra time trying to find his ghosts favourite coffee, which is extremely expensive for coffee , but Yuta didn't mind as much. So when he finally opened the door and said , "I'm baackk!" He was enveloped in cold air which he assumed was a ghosts form of a hug.  "I missed you too buddy , give me a second." 

He set his bag down and grabbed two cups from the cupboard and made them coffee. He put one cup across from him and then said, "Well ? Sit! Tell me about yourself." The chair moved and the cup was lifted , but no talking happened. "Wait , can you even talk?" Silence . Then,

" _Yes."_ Yuta jumped , "That was creepy."

_"I thought you wanted me to talk."_

"Yeah but if I can't see you it's a little more weird." Wind blew around him before a pair of eyes looked at him. They were almond shaped with chocolate brown irises. "Floating eyes? This makes it a bit more scary man." The ghost who was definitely a man laughed softly before the rest of his body appeared. 

He was Chinese and was wearing a black shirt with a blue and white flannel jacket and blue jeans. He had dreadlocks so he must've passed recently , Yuta had moved in only two years ago. " _You have questions , I'll start with the basics. My name is Dong Sicheng, I'm forever 25 , and have been since 2014."_

"Are all ghosts sweet?" Sicheng smiled , " _No , most ghosts are angry spirits. Every so often there is a nice one though."_

"How do you become a ghost?"

_"Don't be getting any thoughts , being a ghost isn't very fun sometimes. Normally ghosts were bad in their lives and are cursed to live eternity in a place they hate or did the bad things in. I was good I guess and I had some unfinished business to take care of, in a good way that is."_

"What was that unfinished business? " Sicheng looked down,  _"I had died without telling my mother I loved her. We had a fight about a little something and we were driving, then there was a driver and he was on the wrong side. We were arguing and we didn't see and he rammed us off the road. I - I pushed my mom out the car to save her and it blew up. I asked someone - anyone to let me see her one last time and I got my wish. When I got here she had believed she had nothing else to live for and-"_ Sicheng's voice broke and through impulse Yuta went to him and put a hand on his shoulder ; surprisingly it was solid , so Yuta wrapped him in a hug.  _"A ghost can't come back if their business isn't completed, and since mine will never be I gave myself a new mission."_

"And what is your new mission ?" 

_"To make you happy."_

 

 

Sicheng did make him happy, he was still just as helpful as not-visible-or-communicating Sicheng but it made more sense now when he peeked into the bathroom. Yuta caught him up on the three years worth of good music he missed, and all good shows. Visible Sicheng also brought new things about him. Like he could eat , but chooses to only eat snacks when the watch movies or have friends over. (They thought it was a little scary to have a ghost but then they realized Sicheng couldn't hurt anyone if he tried. He was a sore loser sometimes , resulting in him messing with the lights but everyone had been through it so often they just teased him.)

He was an emotional little ghost so Yuta had to make sure the movies had no car crash deaths , or horror movies. Sicheng would snuggle into Yuta and hide until the other would tell him it was okay. He sometimes would go invisible but that rarely happened now , normally used it to scare Johnny when he was over. 

Yuta also learned that all of Sicheng was solid. (I'll let you interpret that on your own.)

But the best thing he learned was that Sicheng  liked being the big spoon .


	5. Just The Way You Are

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sicheng has been long distance relationshiping with Yuta for about two years now, now they will meet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sicheng ily bitch

Sicheng dug threw his closet, looking for the few short sleeves shirts he owned. All he had was a red shirt with the Nike sign, but it would look good with his black pants. Today was the day he would meet Yuta in person for the first time. He was happy and scared right now. He was happy because holy fucking shit he loves Yuta, he was scared because will Yuta love him? Of course he knew Yuta did, but now he was getting the full package. 

Shicheng had scars and burns. When he was 10 a fire burned his house. He got his sister out before it could take her, but it would take him instead , he almost died. His face was clear other than a little cut on his eyebrow. Sicheng's arms had light burn marks on his right elbow and a dark one on his left bicep. He had stiches on his thigh that would never fully go away, along with the burns that captured his stomach. His hands had dark spots that hurt to look at , but he hated his legs . They had scars everywhere, some lighter rhan his tone. He couldn't even look at his arms though.

They had scars that weren't from the fire .

Yuta would be there in 15 minutes, Sicheng could busy himself until then without thinking about what he hated. Yuta had seen his leg scars before , and the burns on his elbow , but never the ones on his stomach or arms. The arms because his camera was kinda fuzzy and his stomach because, well, I'll let you guess.

He was about to try and call Yuta when he remembered the two things they had promised to not do until they met. " _No calls the day I come."_ And the hard one,  _No 'I love you' until we meet._ Sicheng had cringed visibly at that one over the video call. Yuta had never given him an answer to why he said that, but Sicheng followed it nonetheless. 

Then the doorbell rang. Sicheng shot up and practically ran for the door. He peeked threw the hole and there he was , his hair still beautifully sleek and her black. Sicheng took a breath before opening his door.

Yuta's eyes widened before he smiled and scooped Sicheng into his hold. "Sicheng... " He had more to say but was just enjoying the feeling. Yuta was actually here, hugging him, then  _kissing him._ He tasted like strawberries and happiness. "You're here, you're here." Sicheng said , burrying his head into Yuta's shirt as tears pricked his eyes. "I'm really here baby, and I'm not going anywhere ." When Sicheng looked back up at him, he saw Yuta was crying. Yuta never cried.

"You're so beautiful." Sicheng looked down, knowing he should say something back but all he could think about was himself. He wasn't beautiful , he was practically a rag doll with mismatched colored skin around him. "Not really."

"You are though, " Yuta traced his eyebrow. "Here." He rubbed over his elbow and arms, "There too." He nudged their feet together, "Your legs are perfect." He ran his hands to the bottom of Sicheng's shirt, eyes asking for permission. Sicheng nodded and Yuta lifted it enough for the dark mark to be seen. "And you're beautiful here also." He placed a kiss on the burn and Sicheng felt tears run down his face. "Do you really think that?"

"Of course . I'm so hopelessly in love with you that I don't know what to do with myself sometimes. I love you. " Sicheng looked at him. Those words . The words he'd been waiting two years to hear had finally been spoken.  _I love you._  

"I love you too. I have since the beginning. " And Yuta placed a kiss to his temple and then they lived on. And Sicheng felt a little more beautiful.


	6. Fools

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Only fools fall for Nakamoto Yuta, Sicheng supposes he's a fool.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This broke my heart and tore my soul to write
> 
> Thx Troye Sivan

Sicheng collapsed onto his bed and cried. He was an idiot . A horrible , played idiot. He really thought Yuta liked him. 

 

Nakamoto Yuta was one of the most quiet people on campus, he never really disrupted anything , never partied until he was blackout drunk, yet he was on the basketball team. He was also gay . Sicheng was picked to help him with one of his classes and even after the sessions stopped , they still spent time with eachother. Yuta taught him how to shoot correctly , Sicheng taught him how to dance. Sicheng came to every game he could and Yuta attended his tournament . (Which Sicheng won and Yuta had given him flowers.) 

They stayed up long past reasonable with classes to play Mario kart and any other games they could fine , only to mix coffee with Monster the next morning and hope to not die. 

_"Sicheng, how long will we be by each others side?"_

_"For forever and a year."_ None of that meant he was going to end up with him, but they were so close Sicheng just hoped. Yuta had only dated one person before, but had broken it off after two months.  _"Not what I wanted. Only fools fall for me."_ Sicheng hadn't payed the last part any mind, now he wished he did. 

Today he was going to hang out with Yuta when he saw him Taeyong . Not like they were only talking , but Taeyong was kissing Yuta , and Yuta was kissing back. When they broke apart they saw Sicheng and Yuta told him . Taeyong was his boyfriend now, that he had fallen for Taeyong first. That he was going to tell Sicheng earlier. Sicheng just gave a smile and said it was alright , that they can reschedule their plans. 

Every word said made the hole in him deeper, his heart got heavier each step back to his apartment. He took off his shoes and flung himself onto the bed, he cried until his head hurt and he couldn't see straight. If only fools fall for Yuta, Sicheng supposes he's the biggest fool there is.


	7. In a Heartbeat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A : today I get the heart transplant  
> B : yeah... don't forget I love you  
> A : *after surgery* where's B  
> c : who do you think gave you the heart 
> 
> plus surprise at the end

Sicheng looked at Yuta , he smiled softly. "Its today, after today no more waking up to attacks and extra doctor visits. " Yuta smiled back , placing a kiss to Sicheng's cheeks. The younger was nervous , but the way Yuta was wringing his hands showed he was worse than him. " Ya! You're not the one about to be cut open , you can't be nervous. What are you even nervous about?"

"There could be complications, bad complications-"

"Yuta they're trained surgeons, I'm most likely not their first time for a heart transplant."

"But still..." Sicheng caressed Yuta's face. "I'll be fine , maybe as crazy as a looney tune after but fine," Yuta still looked nervous , "Tell you what. I'm perfectly fine with a beating heart I'll buy you dinner for a month. You pick the restaurant , but it has to be in our budget." Yuta smiled and rolled his eyes. "Deal." Then the nurse came out, "Nakamoto Sicheng?" Sicheng stood up , Yuta grabbed his hand and puled him into a hug. "good luck."

"I'll be fine you dumb fuck ." Ignoring the language Yuta pressed a kiss to Sicheng's lips. "Don't forget I love you."

" I never have. See you soon Yuta .

 

* * *

 

 

Despite what he originally believed , Sicheng was not on that weird medicine that fucked you up. He was completely sober when his friends started visiting. He was fine, prefect even. No more attacks n the middle of the night, no more worrying if the day might be his last. Johnny was still here , on his phone. _"I'm here because Yuta will crash probably when you guys drive back."_ Is what he said when he stayed longer than the others. The only other person he hasn't seen today was Yuta. "Johnny?"

"Sup?"

"Where's Yuta ?" Johnny turned off his phone and waked over to the hospital bed, looking anywhere but the patient. "Sicheng. You don't know ... who gave you the heart?"

"What?" Yuta gave himself up, just so Sicheng could live _really_ live. He put a hand over his - Yuta's heart. It was beating, at least he's exactly how Yuta wanted him. Alive , and working on the well part. "oh my god..." Johnny then took in a breath. "I'm kidding . He went to go buy you food. " Sicheng turned to face Johnny, then the words sunk in . "I hate you Seo! " Johnny let out a laugh. "I'm sorry . "

"No you're not ."

"I am slightly. You almost cried." Sicheng just let out a huff and sunk back down in the bed. "He would do it though. If there were no other way."

"I know , I'd do the same in a heartbeat. "

"He knows. Luck you guys. Last time I got hurt Ten laughed , took a video, sent it to everyone, _then_ checked on me." Sicheng laughed then groaned. "What's wrong?'

"I owe Yuta dinner for a month."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is shameless self promo ... As soon as I publish this I'll be starting a Yuwin oneshot called 'Losing Control' will be out today or next week got no clue , won't be in here though


	8. Whoosh n shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Witches who use their powers for modern stuff AU

"I'm nervous."

"You always say that. "

"But I'm actually nervous Yuta I think I'm going to puke." If it were anyone else Yuta would've put his hand to their head and made their feeling evaporate, but he learned quickly that Sicheng wouldn't allow it. Five years of this and Sicheng always said the same thing, which would always prompt Yuta to do what he was about to do. He lifted his hand just for it to be swatted away, "I'm fine, you always do that."

"Then stop being needy."

" I'm yours I'm supposed to be needy." Yuta rolled his eyes as the manager told them five minutes. Five minutes before the duo show what they're made of , even though they've been to Seoul countless times for a performance, it always gave them a little buzz. Yuta gave a small laugh. Just 30 years ago, nine before he was born, magic was called a horror. Now there were thousands of people out there to see them. 

Yuta's gift was emotions. Not only could he see the aura of how you felt , he could also change it (Hence why he tried to touch Sicheng's face.) He put himself to good use when he found out it made his songs just that more happy (light blue) , just that more sad (dark blue), just that more sensual(dark purple). Like right now Sicheng aura was grey-red ; grey being the color of nervousness and red of passion. This was normal for Sicheng before performing, he was probably the same. 

The easiest way to explain Sicheng's powers would be to say he was pretty much the fucking avatar. He could control earth , air , fire , water. You know, avatar stuff. Yuta used to tease him about it by reciting the series until Sicheng set some of his hair aflame. He could control it by the flick of his wrist or with his entire body. Most used wands but his blew up on him. When Sicheng danced he could get water to follow his rhythm, or get flowers climbing the building . "Ready?" Sicheng asked him as he stretched one last time. "Always am."

"Don't blind yourself this time."

"I look at an entire crowds aura once-"

"You're a dumbass , accept it. Go!" Yuta walked onto the stage , and almost blinded himself  _again._ The crowd had changed from a normal light green to an excited bright orange . The yelling didn't bother him , but he really needed to remember to turn it off before he went out. He walked to his booth off to the side and started the music. Their intro song started out slow, and if you'd never been to one of their concerts you'd think you messed up somewhere when buying tickets. But fifteen seconds after the song got started the beat dropped and Sicheng came out. He blew in (quite literally) and made the crowd go from the original orange to a mix of orange and gold.

That meant they were having fun.

Neither of them spoke much during the show, the music and movement gave enough. But Yuta had to say something about this song, "This next one is something I didn't know I wanted to put out, but Sicheng threatened to do something crazy if I didn't. I had this thought of making this ever since we got to perform in Seoul the first time so this is for you guys we've never performed it live before. This is called Sun and Moon." The only reason he didn't want to put it out was because he sung in it , nothing was wrong with his voice , he just didn't think it was very good for this performance. Normally someone else or even sometimes Sicheng sung on vocal tracks. 

Yuta put his lips to the microphone and started. The vocals did their purpose , and gave depth to the dance which most were focused on. The younger brought in mist and dark pirple flowers that went around the outline of the stage . Yuta looked at Sicheng, then looked for his aura. It was a purple so dark it was borderline blue. Sicheng felt bliss. A far cry from the exited orange he was just a song ago. At the end Sicheng looked at him, Yuta read off what the Chinese was trying to put out. The colour was a beautiful pink. 

* * *

 

"We did great, as usual." Yuta said when it was all over. "I swear after this tour I'm quitting. I can't feel my legs."

"You said that last time."

"But I mean it this time."

"You also said that last time. "

"Don't quote me on anything I say when I'm tired." Yuta rolled his eyes as Sicheng flopped on the bed. "What woul d you be doing right now if the protesting hadn't happened all those years ago?" Yuta turned to Sicheng, "Why do you ask?" 

"No clue , I'd probably still be dancing. But would have to be more under control." 

"Well," Yuta thought for a moment, "I'd still do something good with my gift . Maybe help people with ainxiety. I like this better though."

"Me too." 

"By the way Sicheng, I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Go listen to Sun and Moon by nct if you haven't cause it makes you body roll and cry.
> 
>  
> 
> Thanks for reading comments are greatly appreciated! 안녕!


	9. The question

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is what 1 a.m dance practices are for

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of fun , a little bit of actual plot , mostly banter

Yuta loved to watch Sicheng dance , it gave a different feel to the world, their few hours of silence and not caring. He'd practice until he was perfect , which could be until 5 a.m.  _"It's better to practice at night."_ Sicheng claimed , and so Yuta would tag along to make sure he didn't pass out halfway through his routine. 

This time Sicheng had a new routine to learn, it was a duet with him and Ten, the Thai boy who recently transferred to Sicheng's school. They'd been practicing together for at least a month, and  ~~Yuta got really frickin jealous but it's okay because he's practically married to Johnny.~~  Yuta got a little worried with Sicheng spending time with someone he just met and not letting him come to the practices. 

So he was more than happy to roll his ass out of bed when Sicheng said it was a good time to practice and bring Yuta.  _"I keep messing up on a little part, and I didn't want you to see until I had gotten it down."_ Yuta may not know much about dancing, but he knew when someone messed up. Well the dead giveaway was that Sicheng had to do a jump and he either wobbled or fell entirely. "You good?"

"Yeah, just give me a few more minutes." Sicheng got back up and started the music again. Yuta knew if he didn't get it right a few minutes would turn into hours, which would turn into being late for class. An hour later Sicheng ran through the routine for the umpteenth time - and stuck the fucking landing. Yuta jumped up and gave an air fist. "You did it!"

"Finally!" Sicheng gave a shy smile and his cheeks got a pink tint. "Look out , Dong Sicheng is about to become the best dancer in the world." Sicheng smiled even brighter and replied, "And you're going to become the greatest nurse in history."

"Isn't that Clara Barton?"

"Best nurse of this century!" Yuta smiled and Sicheng gave a fast turn before a second bow. "Date me." Yuta said out of literally nowhere, sicheng quirked an eyebrow, "What?"

"Date. Me." Sicheng smiled again, "We've been dating since high school."

"Dating 2.0 ."

"Isn't that marriage? Can't we wait until  _I_ get out of school for that? You still have like ten years left before you can do things." Sicheng started putting his stuff back in his bag when Yuta spoke again, "Date me forever?"

"I'll date you until you put a ring on my finger. You're going to be the money maker." The Japanese furrowed his brow, "Dancing pays a lot you know. You could buy the ring."

"I'm the girl in this relationship, your circle of friends already decided that."

"Not in bed you are," Yuta said under his breath , "I buy the ring if you cook." 

"I'd cook anyway , or else you'd starve." Sicheng held the door open for his partner. When they got to their apartment Yuta ran Sicheng a shower , and both were in the bed in thirty minutes. 

"Since you'd always cook, are you implying I don't have to buy the ring?"

"No , you're so buying the ring." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I've been gone for a while. If you watch the news or haven't been living under a rock you know about hurricane Harvey. I was going to update but I was busy trying to not drown. I'm safe now , in a different state but the WiFi is still bad so it might be some time until I do anything. 
> 
> ALSO GIVE ME PROMTS IN THE COMMENTS


	10. Tell me how

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I promised you children so here's my first miniseries

Yuta felt like an idiot , the biggest in the world. He let the tears roll down as he slid behind his door. In the spam of minutes , he'd lost his best friend and boyfriend.

* * *

 

_"What do you mean you didn't tell your her about us?" Sicheng half yelled when they got back to now Yuta's apartment. They had returned from lunch with Yuta's mother. To put it simply, it was painfully akward for the three of them. Sicheng realized quickly his mother didn't know, seeing as she didn't even know he existed until that day. They attempted to make small talk, but the silence continued to grow, and Yuta made smiles that didn't quite reach his eyes._

_"I tried. So, so , so many times, but I couldn't. "_

_"My parent know, they've known since the first week. You talk practically all the time, but when you actually need to open your mouth you don't have any words!" Sicheng stormed out. This wasn't the first time they'd fought, nor was it their longest , but it was the biggest. Yuta was prone to forgetting to tell people the big things, and he supposed Sicheng got tired of the constant forgetfulness._

_Sometimes Sicheng would walk out , but he'd always be back by the next day._

* * *

It had been three days.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will be updated as quickly as possible (aka when jinlee doesn't have writers block lmao) but this prompt has been in the back of my mind for a bit


	11. Missing you (tell me how pt2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Do you miss me?
> 
> Cause I miss you

"He always comes back," Is what Johnny told him when he came over to Yuta's apartment, "You might forget everything and talk a little to loud and often but he always comes back." It was true. Sicheng would come back and would forgive Yuta, and the cycle continues. 

Yuta was worried Sicheng realized he wasn't worth having to walk out his own home every two weeks. That there were better people in the world , ones that would remember all the dates and tell their parents when they dated. "What if-" Yuta's voice cracked , "What if he finds someone better than me? Why do I forget everything? Why couldn't I just tell her?" Johnny gave Yuta a hug, "People forget things all the time , you're normal. As for why you couldn't tell your mom? It takes courage to not only come out , but then have to tell her you're dating -  _have been_ dating for a long time. " Johnny let him go. "Thanks Seo."

"Anytime Yuta," The American walked to the door , "He'll be back. He always comes back." 

* * *

 

 Yuta picked up the phone for the eighth time that night on the now fifth day, it was almost midnight. The phone rang twice and went to voicemail which meant Sicheng was there but he wasn't going to talk. Yuta left a voicemail this time. "Sicheng," He collected himself, "Sicheng I know you are mad , and probably hate me right now. I would hate me too, but I need to say sorry. I tried so many times to tell her, but - but I'm scared Sicheng. She's the only family I've got, I don't want her to leave me. I promise I'll try. Even if you don't come back I'll- I'll try. If she doesn't accept me at least I did it." And now he was crying, he tried to steady his voice. "I don't even know if you care anymore , but I love you. So so  _so_ much. " Yuta ended the voice mail . He hoped Sicheng came back , but most of all he hoped if he didn't, that he found someone better than Yuta.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1000+ READS BITCH THE FUCK? Y'ALL NEED JESUS BUT SO DO I . THANK EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU LOVELY NCTZIENS ! 
> 
> 감사합니다 NCTZIENS! 1000+ 가 읽습니다 ? 이뫈개소리야?! 사랑해 사랑해!


	12. Come Back Home (Tell me how pt3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Third and final part

 It was two a.m when someone knocked at Yuta's door. He opened the door to see someone he hasn't in a long time now. As tired as he was right now, he immediately knew who it was. Sicheng was wearing a thin jacket and shivering. "Yuta..." 

"It's freezing outside come in ." He wanted to ask Sicheng alot of questions, he was going to until he looked at the Chinese boy properly. He looked like the life had been sucked out of him, more tired than how he'd come back after dancing. Yuta went to his kitchen to see if he had anything to give him. "Do you want something to eat...?" He stopped talking when he heard a noise come from the couch. Sicheng had fallen asleep , the little snores that lulled Yuta to slumber returned . It made Yuta remember for the third time that day how much he missed his Sicheng.  He didn't even know if he could call Sicheng his anymore. Yuta got Sicheng out of his shoes and jacket , making sure he didn't wake him, before carrying him to Yuta's bed. 

He placed the younger down softly and covered him with an extra blanket just in case. Then Yuta traced his cheek lightly with his thumb, and went to sleep on the couch.

* * *

 

The next morning Sicheng was still there, a relief to Yuta , and was sitting at the kitchen table. Yuta stood to go over there, but Sicheng had already sat on the couch. They needed to talk. There was so much he wanted to say, yet didn't have the words. Both were quiet for a bit longer until Yuta thought out loud, "Almost two weeks..." Sicheng cringed slightly, "I'm sorry-"

"No I didn't mean it like that. I mean, I should be apologizing right now not you."

"I was with my parents,  I was safe. Took the first flight to China available. " Sicheng barley whispered , looking down. "How did you get to the airport? You left your car here." Sicheng didn't speak for a moment and took a deal breath. "Johnny drove me." Yuta wanted to grab his phone and tell at Johnny . For not telling him where his boyfriend was , then  _lying_ about not knowing. "Don't get mad at him, I told him not to talk about it. He doesn't even know I'm back."

"Then how'd you-"

"I walked. " Yuta couldn't even imagine Sicheng in the freezing cold for an hour, because he didn't want to see Yuta. "Do you have a cold?" Sicheng shook his head. They were silent for what felt like hours when in truth it may have only been minutes, and then Yuta asked the question he'd been wanting to. "Why- why did you come back? You could've picked anyone else, someone better than me. You could've been  happier." Sicheng looked straight at Yuta, "To be honest, I was angry at first. I hated you for a few days. Then it dissipated into slight anger. My mom talked to me about it, and told me it's not the same for everyone. I mean even I was scared of telling. I guess I was so caught up in everything I forgot people have other problems. Then you sent that voicemail and- I just knew I screwed up big time. "

"You know that's not true. This isn't the first time I've made mistakes like this . " 

"It won't be the last either, but everyone makes them. You make me happy Yuta. On this planet, in any lifetime, you are the best for me." Sicheng wrapped Yuta in a hug. "I missed you Sicheng."

"I missed you too love." Sicheng let go and rested his forehead on the others. Yuta looked at him with loving eyes, "Can I?" The Chinese nodded and pressed their lips together. Maybe making love after a fight and forgiveness was how Yuta wanted to spend his day.

* * *

Two weeks later they met Yuta's mom, who was a little skeptic of their relationship at first, but fell in love with Sicheng when she realized how much he's been trying to learn Japanese. To keep as much of what Yuta loved about home in Japan here in Korea. She beamed even brighter when she found out he could cook, and were accepted with more than opened arms. "You really love that boy don't you?" His mother asked him one night they attended Sicheng's performance. Yuta smiled as his once again boyfriend went through the routine like the back of his hand. "Yeah, he's the best for me." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh I hope you liked it, comments are definitely appreciated and I'll probably respond!


	13. If only I could say...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I love you

Yuta looked at his boyfriend who was currently engrossed in the book he was reading. He smiled as the emotions the book gave him were very much expressed on his face. He knew very well what had just happened, he lent the book to Sicheng. "Sicheng, we have to go pick up Mark from the airport." There was no reply, and Yuta furrowed his brow. "Sicheng!" Still no answer. No book was that good. Then Yuta remembered. He tapped Sicheng's shoulder,  _"Time to go pick up Mark."_

_"Five more minutes?"_

_"I just spent five minutes trying to get your attention. "_ Sicheng laughed before he pointed to his ears,  _"Sorry , I was busy being deaf."_ Yuta stuck out his tongue and signed something not pg, before grabbing the keys to pick up their friend.

 

Sicheng was born totally and completely deaf , so it was easier for him to exist than people who became deaf. Subtitles were a must, along with always having paper and pen, and the knowledge of Chinese and Korean sign language. It didn't bother him that he was called things behind his back, granted , he couldn't hear them, but the looks people gave him when he walked around said it all. He felt out of place in his hometown, and he felt even worse in Seoul.

 

That all changed when he met Yuta . 

 

He first met him while he was looking at a garden, the roses and violets reminding him of an English poem. He didn't notice him at first until he saw the others mouth move, and Sicheng realized that he was speaking to him. He quickly pulled out his pen and paper.  _I'm sorry, I can't hear you. Like at all._ Yuta's eyes widened in realization before using the paper to write his own sentence.  _Apologies, I was asking which flower was your favorite._

After that they hit it off instantly first as friends then as a couple. It was hard at first, Yuta couldn't sign and Korean was a hard language to lip read , but they made it work with some help from friends and eventually Yuta being able to sign in Chinese and Sicheng being able to lip-read some Japanese. That was two years ago. Now signing was a mostly easy task for Yuta, to the point he would accidentally use it with his friends that could hear. Sicheng just wished he could give Yuta something in return.

Mark was Sicheng's favorite friend (Yuta doesn't count) . He brought good food from Canada whenever he visited. He was also Sicheng's go-to when there was a problem and visa versa. This time Mark was visiting for Yuta's birthday which was in two weeks. 

_"Hey Mark."_

_"Sup?"_

_"What did you get for Yuta's birthday? "_

_"Can you understand American Sign language? "_ Sicheng nodded.  _"I bought him One Okay Rock tickets and backstage passes."_ Sicheng's eyes widened before smiling. Yuta had been wanting those since last month, or maybe longer and Sicheng just didn't hear him talk about it. " _What about you?"_ Sicheng honestly didn't know what he was going to give him.  _"I don't know ye-"_

_"Time to go guys. Use a sign language I'm familiar with next time please."_

_"Stop eavesdropping ."_ Yuta stuck out his tounge and pulled Mark's suitcase , and sicheng still needed to think of a gift.

 

Back at their house a welcome party was starting up. Taeyang had set up decorations while Jaehyun did food. The rest of their friends filed in shortly. Sicheng didn't normally like parties , but everyone here he could talk to and they could talk back enough. When he saw Yuta and Renjun talking, that's when it hit him. He grabbed Mark and Johnny and dragged them off.  _" So as Mark knows I don't have a gift for Yuta."_

_"Mark how do you curse in sign language? "_

_"If I had good morals I would not tell you. Luckily I have none. Which word do you need to use?"_

_"STOP TRYING TO INSULT ME !"_

_"How do you not have a gift for your boyfriend?"_

_"I don't know but I have a good idea for one now but I need your help."_

_"What's in it for us?"_

_"I won't tell Yuta that it wasn't a faulty oven that burned our kitchen."_ Johnny's mouth dropped open and Mark took a step back.  _" You wouldn't. "_

_"You don't know that. Now help me."_

* * *

 

Two weeks later the house was full once again with friends, this time celebrating something different. After singing happy birthday and Sicheng signing along. Mark signed and spoke ,  _"Before we stuff ourselves with cake and Yuta opens presents. Sicheng would like to start."_ Everyone turned to the Chinese boy.  _"I have something very important for the birthday boy. This took me weeks to do."_ Sicheng took a breath and concentrated. 

"Happy birfday to you, happy birfday to you. Happy birfday my 'Uta , happy birfday to you. I wuv you." When Sicheng looked up he saw his friends smiling at him and Yuta, Yuta was walking towards him and wrapping him in a hug.  _"You don't know how long I've wished you could say that."_

_"Did I say it right?"_

_"Perfectly."_ Sicheng smiled , "I wuv you. I wuv you wots." Yuta looked at his boyfriend of two years, his perfect boyfriend, his boyfriend who could now tell him he loved him.


	14. 6 a.m

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sicheng's made a mistake, at least he thinks it is

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I gave you a happy chapter now back to angst (with happy ending of course)

When Sicheng wakes up he knows something's wrong. He's not in his room, he's in his best friends. And his best friend is sleeping right next to him. Then he remembers what happened last night, how much he wanted it.

Yuta had just broken up with his girlfriend of two years because she cheated on him. He called Sicheng over to help him forget. Maybe watch a movie or talk about all the dumb things that have happened to them in the five years they've been friends. Sicheng's loved all five of them, fell in love in the second, cried on the third, and has been holding on since then. At first it started out normal , Yuta invited him in and Sicheng said she wasn't worth him . Then Yuta leaned in and the Chinese boy back up.  _"Let me."_ And he did, and he kissed him back.

Things escalated from there.

Yuta wasn't drunk, there was nothing in his system, but he was broken. Because of that Sicheng had still taken advantage of him even if he didn't make the first move. A cloud of guilt hung over him as he moved to not wake Yuta and found his clothes in a pile on the floor. He cringed at how stupid he was last night, to let anything carry on, and he  _enjoyed it._ He felt horrible. He didn't want to face Yuta when he woke up. 

Sicheng had made it to his shoes when, "Where are you going?" He turned to face Yuta. The Japanese boy was clothed and had a confused look on his face. 

"Look , I messed up. You're my friend and you were sad and I took advantage of you. I should've stopped before I started." And Yuta looked at him with those cursed doe eyes, those beautiful understanding eyes, "Sicheng, sit down," The said boy sat down, worried about what Yuta would say, "Don't be so tense it's just me. I know what you're thinking, that you messed up and I hate you. I don't. Nothing has to change between us unless you want it to." Sicheng looked at him. "What?"

"I like you Sicheng, like a lot. Even more than I liked her. I did like her in the beginning, then I fell out of love with her and in love with you. So when I found out she didn't really love it didn't hurt like I expected it to, and I invited you over and..." He didn't need to finish. "Do you want to? Have what you had with her that is."

"Yes. As long as you'll forgive me for being blind to this for years." Sicheng laughed, "You're forgiven." 

"You know this means you can't get rid of me now." Sicheng smiled and hugged his Yuta, "Wasn't planning on it anytime soon."


	15. Off day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> These were Sicheng's favorite moments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Legit just pure fluff

If there were any days Sicheng loved, they were his days off. Don't get him wrong , he loves nct127 , he's finally doing what he loves. But everyone needs time to just sleep in and be in love.

Anyone who's spent a night in the same house as Dong Sicheng knew that Dong Sicheng did not sleep in. It wasn't like he purposely woke up that early, he just had an internal alarm clock set for 6:30 to 7 in the morning. He'd be up, cooking for the members or practicing his Korean with Mark (another early riser.) When they had the luxury of a day off. Today was no different with the sleep part.

The love part was the only thing that changed.

Until he moved in with the others, he'd never found someone for him. That he loved with all his soul. But then he met Yuta. Neither of them know exactly when it happened, it seemed like it simply slotted into their lives. The small touches and light kisses. So they decided on the first time they really , _really_ kissed to be their anniversary. (Taeyong actually knows it's March 23rd but who's he to ruin their story of a non-offical aniversarry? ) Now Sicheng gets the feeling of having someone to wrap his arms around and call his own. To protect and love with all his soul. 

Like this morning . This morning Yuta had Koala-ed around the Chinese boy and was wrapped around him. Normally by now Sicheng would be up already, getting food ready and talking to Mark. But since Yuta, this was how he spent off days. The sun had barely begun to trickle into their room, small lines hitting thier bed. He smiled as he tried to get out of the Japanese boy's arms without waking him up. No such luck, Yuta hugged him tighter. "Winko don't leave me. " Sicheng laughed softly, voice deeper than normal in the morning, "I'm not leaving. I'll just be a room away. "

"But the bed is cold without you. "

Sicheng sighed and placed a kiss on his forehead, "Fine. Five minutes more, then we have to socialize. "

"Deal," And Yuta buried his head in Sicheng's chest. "You're cooking though." Sicheng could live with that. Besides , he had all day to enjoy Yuta's love for him. 


	16. Sparkles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuta had a crap day, but Sicheng and one other person know how to make it better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally I was going to have some angst but then I was like naahh

To put it simply, Nakamoto Yuta's work day sucked. He had so much piled up because his coworker continued to slack off (I'm looking at you, Seo) to the point he's had overtime all this week . It's Friday, no one wants to work overtime on Fridays! But that is what he and his coworker who slacked off (Still you Seo) today. And now he was finally ,  _finally ,_ getting to go home. 

He was tired of sitting in that chair all day. While he was thankful to have a job, he didn't want to be there that long. So when he pulled into the driveway of his house, he just wanted to be with the people inside. To his surprise the house was silent. Yuta took off his shoes and jacket and looked around. Nothing had changed, but a piece of paper on their table.  _Follow the line Mr. Nakamoto!_ He looked up and saw a sparkly red line of string pinned to the wall. He laughed softly and followed. 

The first time the red line stopped in the hall bathroom,  _the first time you did my haiir you messed up in here._  Yuta's eyes rolled.Of course this would be brought up. Just because Sicheng did hair better than him. The line trailed up the stairs and into a guest room.  _Yuuttaaa remember what happened here? Last time it was painted over pink, now It's yellow._ He looked around , smiling and remembering everything that happened in that room. The good and bad, the hilarious and the not-so-funny . He looked down and the ring on his finger, and kissed it softly. Yuta remembered how he's so lucky before continuing. 

The next stop was in Yuta and Sicheng's bedroom,  _not important I just wanted to sit here for a litlle._ Then Yuta laughed out loud and went to the finally place the red line took him. This was another pink room, and the people he'd been looking for the entire time were. 

Sicheng and Lihwa were sitting on her bed covered in hello kitty sheets, matching smiles coming from them. Lihwa had pieces of glitter in her hair and Sicheng had much more on his shirt. The cylinder of glitter next to them. "Daddy! Did you like it? Baba said I could write some of the words." Which explained the spelling mistakes. 

"I did sweetie , thank you for the surprise. Thank you too my Winko." Yuta said looking at Sicheng , who gave an even brighter smile. "We know how hard you've been working-"

"-Because you came back really late and then you wouldn't play as much and... " Lihwa looked at Sicheng , who was looking at the little five year old who cut him off. "She gets it from you Nakamoto Yuta." Sicheng says and kissed their daughter. "I'll admit to that Nakamoto Sicheng, " The Japanese said before placing a kiss to his husbands lips and cheeks, "Now , who would like to tell me what happened with the glitter my loves?" The girl raised her hand, "Okay, so Baba was helping me write the cards . So I want to make make a pic - pic - pic.."

"Picture?"

"Yes! And I wanted to make the sparkles Baba has in his hair when he does shows. And Baba gave me the glitter and then he tickled me so now it is all in hair! But it's okay because we clean all up!" Lihwa pulled out a piece of paper from behind her and gave it to Yuta. Her Japanese father smiled at the stick figure versions of his family. True to her word, glitter was in Sicheng's hair. Actually, all his hair was glitter. Yuta was standing on the right, a big smile on his face and glitter on his tie. In the center Lihwa had drawn a self portrait with her dress all glitter. "Do you like it?"

"Like it ? I love it!" He scooped his daughter into his lap and took another look at the picture. "You know it could use a little more glitter..." He picked up the cylinder, "Here!" He sprinkled some into Sicheng's hair. The Chinese man's mouth formed an O as his family was laughing at him. "You," he covered Lihwa's ears , "Asshole." 

"At least you look like stick figure Sicheng now." Yuta said through laughs. And he was happy, because of a boy, a girl , and some glitter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler for next fic: hanahaki


	17. Hanahaki Disease (version 1) PICK WISELY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hanahaki Disease : A disease in which flower petals come from your lungs, can be removed via surgery but remove the feelings as well. 
> 
>  
> 
> Can also be cured if the love is returned.

But sometimes, fate is good

Yuta was throwing up flowers again and Sicheng didn't know what to do. Yuta told him not to worry about him, that it would be alright, but now his friend was practically dying in his bathroom. When Sicheng looked down , there was a trail of crysanthemums to the door. The Chinese went to pick them up and throw them in the trash, when Yuta came out of the bathroom. "No, you don't have to."

"You're dying, it's the least I can do." Yuta gave a half smile, " I'm not dying, just a little heartbroken. " Sicheng sighed, he'd never had Hanahaki and hopefully never would. But it hurt to see his friend like this. Not only was he coughing up his lungs and flowers, he was depressed about it. He had bags under his eyes from staying up, the couldn't go to work because of how much was in his lungs. Sicheng wished he could find that person and shake them to their core. Who on this planet earth wouldn't like Nakamoto Yuta? He's kind, funny, handsome , and a great friend. Sicheng didn't know where he'd be without him. "When I find out who's causing this, I'm going to hit them on the head with a book. You don't deserve this Yuta."

The elder laughed, "Don't hurt yourself." 

"Who is it." Yuta looked like he was going to start coughing again. "What?"

"Who is it? The person making you feel like this? You don't have to tell me outright, but what are they like? " 

"Well let's see," Yuta leaned back, "They're stupid but sweet, pretty oblivious because I'm bad at hiding feelings. Even if they don't love me I hope they find someone who makes them happy and never have to go through this crap." Sicheng smiled, "You're too nice to them seeing as they're putting you through so much." 

"Yeah well, you hate love as much as you love it."

* * *

 

It took two weeks for Sicheng to realize it. He woke up on Saturday with a single thought ,  _Nakamoto Yuta._ Nothing more nothing less but it meant so much. He coughed and waited for the petals, but none came. Which meant one thing. Sicheng then found the biggest book he owned and hit himself with it. Yes it hurt but no he didn't really care because he had to get to Yuta.  

He had no clue why he didn't realize it sooner, he always was a bit protective of the other whenever anyone else was over. Sicheng always called him first of something went wrong, even before his mother which was saying something. When he was pissed Yuta was one of the two people who could calm him down (his mother being the other.) Dear Lord Dong Sicheng was an idiot, a now dumbstruck idiot.

Conveniently the Japanese boy lived only a few minutes away by car, inconveniently Sicheng didn't have a car so it was a bit longer than a few minutes. When he finally got to Yuta's floor he ran to the door and knocked loudly and so hard he almost fell inside when Yuta opened the door. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Great. " Yuta then pulled Sicheng closer to him and kissed him. Sicheng willingly accepted and wrapped his arms around his neck. They stood there in the doorway, Sicheng trying so hard to tell him how sorry he was in the kiss with Yuta doing just as much back saying  _It's okay it's okay . We're here now._

"Feel free to do that as often as you'd like now." Sicheng said after they'd broken apart and sat down. "Will do, I still feel bad about not taking you on a proper date before kissing your face off. "

"Well if my calculations are right - and they are- neither of us have to work today so maybe we can have our proper date now? I haven't had breakfast yet and I'm hungry."

"Couldn't you have eaten before you came here?"

"No."

Yuta laughed before nodding, "Okay my Winko. Let me put on decent clothes and we can go." 

"We haven't even been on a proper date and you already have a name for me? That was quick."

"But you like it."

"Touché . Now hurry up . I'm starving!" And Yuta placed another long kiss to Sicheng just to stop him from talking. It worked.


	18. Hanahaki Disease (version 2) CHOOSE WISELY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hanahaki Disease : A disease in which flower petals come from your lungs , can be removed via surgery but remove the feelings as well. 
> 
> Can also be cured if the love is returned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of these versions have sad endings and one does not. That is why I'm posting them all at once.

Love was cruel.

Yuta was in love. That much was obvious by looking in his bathroom. Petals were thrown in the trash, some were in his sink . Yuta was currently throwing some up into the toilet, Sicheng rubbing his back as he watched his friend cough up crysanthemums. It had only started lat week, but the amount of flowers Yuta coughed up was horrible. 

"You need anything? Water?" Yuta shook his head, the assault on his lungs over.  _I'd like you to stop what you're doing,_ Yuta thought. This wasn't Sicheng's fault, but at the same time it was.

Sicheng had been Yuta's best friend for god knows how long, nothing seemed to ever change about them. They dated other people, they broke up, they were there for eachother no matter what. They had both had Hanahaki before, but neither ever needed surgery for it. Eventually they got with the person and realized, it wasn't really and truly what they wanted. They were inseparable, rare to see them apart . It was only a matter of time before one of them fell in love with the other. Ah, how much we wish they'd just fall in love back. 

The last time Yuta had Hanahaki it wasnt this bad at all. Rose petals came from his lungs, but more of a burden than a real sickness. What he felt towards Sicheng, and the flowers from Sicheng, were much more brutal. It was sometimes so bad, he could see blood stains on the edges. Yuta wanted Sicheng, but Sicheng didn't want him. And he believes that is what hurts even more than the flower petals themselves. 

"Yuta, you need to get them removed. They're killing you and you know it."  _You're killing me Dong Sicheng, and you don't even know it._ He wanted to cry, but was afraid that they'd come out his eyes. "Tuesday... Tuesday I'll go. They need to, no have to go. " Sicheng smiled , "I'll support you 100 percent Yuta, I want you to be healthy." 

_Helathy ._

* * *

 

True to his word , every day after next Tuesday was fine . The crysanthemums had left him and his bathroom was clean. And how he felt? He was back to friendship, nothing more, nothing less. It was perfect, for a time. 

* * *

Oh how happy it all would have turned out to be if they waited a week more. 

A few days after the surgery , Sicheng began coughing up orange and yellow petals. Marigolds. They plagued his throat and lungs two days after they started. "Yuta, who did you love? You don't have to really tell me, what were they like?" The Chinese asked when they were watching a movie.

"Well They were one of my closest friends, they were always by my side. Also their birthday was in October, super close to mine-" Sicheng cut him off with a horrible cough before running to the bathroom. When after what felt like an eternity, he finally stopped coughing. His lungs and throat burned from the flowers. They flowers were beautiful, but he couldn't breathe. "Sicheng..." Yuta said when he left the bathroom.

"I know I know. Tuesday, I'll get it fixed . I promise, we'll be surgery day buddies together." Yuta laughed and smiled that cursed smile of his, the one that was making Sicheng's lungs scream. They sat and finished the movie, the occasional petal or two falling out of the ill boys mouth as if the thought of getting better calmed the storm in his throat.

* * *

 

True to his words as well, by Wednesday Sicheng had no marigolds in his mouth, but a thought in his mind. With his phone in hand he looked up crysanthemums significance, and what he found shocked him. Crysanthemums were the zodiac flower for Scorpio, he and Yuta's sign. He was Yuta's closest friend who's birthday was matching the information.  His throat felt like the flowers never left, if he had just waited maybe they could've had the happy ending they wanted.


	19. A week

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A week is just a week, but Sicheng is just a little different every day

On Sundays you dread Mondays 

As we try do finish everything we were supposed to do over the weekend in a limited amount of time

It never works really Sicheng, but you do it anyway because the world is boring.

On Mondays you're kind

You despise getting out of bed yet you're the one who's job forces you to be awake at that horrible hour

Yet somehow you always have breakfast made for the both of us and it makes me certain you're not real.

On Tuesdays you're already stressed

This is my least favorite day because you come home with the life gone from your soul and you won't tell me why

But that's okay, because I make you dinner and run you a bath so that we're in love again.

On Wednsdays you laugh

You bring home something for us to look forward to on the weekend no matter how dumb the idea is

So it gives us a reason to push through a few more days just to get there.

On Thursdays you're quiet

This is the most confusing day because I don't know if you're tired or stressed or just need space

But it's never the third because you wrap your arms around me and let me hold you, sometimes you cry.

On Fridays you're loud

You wake up and come home singing that godawful song but it makes me smile and forget about Tuesday

It is the day we stay in and watch a horribly directed movie because we need a reason to laugh and yell at the screen, making me happy.

On Saturdays you're on fire

We never do what needs to be done while the sun is in the sky and instead do whatever the crazy thing was on Wedsnday 

When the sun goes down we're in bed and I love the way your nails drag down my back when we make love , it reminds me that you are mine and I am yours.

On every day you're beautiful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was honestly crap I'm sorry


	20. Trust me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuta is afraid of heights, Sicheng isn't.

"Nope. Never in my life will you make me get on there."

"Yuuttaaa. " 

"No." The thing Yuta was referring to was the giant death machine that they could see even from the other end of the fair. Or as others called it, a Ferris wheel. Yuta wouldn't admit to much, like being cold when Mark told him to bring a jacket, but his fear of heights was something he'd tell your easily because he didn't want to be stuck somewhere where it could be a problem. When he and Sicheng traveled he made sure they only got rooms three stories and below. Now his boyfriend of four years wanted him to get one a Ferris wheel. He was either going to give in and die on the ride, or give in but postpone it to the point they don't go at all. It was already getting dark and by the time they get there the moon will be up in the sky

"Yuta it's not even that high." A lie. If it was tall enough for him to see it was too tall. "Fine, but let me do some other things before to hype myself up." Sicheng complied and they rode some rides, ate cotton candy, and played games. Yuta won him a stuffed bear. "Thank you Taki-taki but you're still getting on the ride." Yuta sighed, knowing either way he would've been defeated. "One last kiss before I die up there?" Sicheng laughed and leaned down to press a lovely long kiss to Yuta's lips as the Japanese wrapped his hands around Sicheng waist. When they came up for air Sicheng rested his forehead on the others. "You ready?" Yuta really wasn't and he knew Sicheng wouldn't really make him, but he's made Sicheng face his fear of planes many times now to the point he doesn't get nervous other than takeoff and landing. Yuta could do this. He could do this.

"I'll never do it again after this. I don't see why you like them so much." Yuta said as the walked to the line of terror. It was only when they got in line Yuta started being visibly worried to where Sicheng looked back at him, "You okay love? You know we don't have to go, I'll just go on my own tomorrow. It's in town a few days. " Yuta shook his head, "No nope. I am not afraid . " The older told himself as Sicheng gave the woman their tickets as she quirked an eyebrow, "Is you're boyfriend gonna be okay?" Yuta nodded with his mouth slightly open, "H-how did you-"

"Honey you too are very obvious, enjoy your ride." Sicheng nodded in thanks before grabbing the other boys hand and leading him into the car. One of the workers came and closed the door and Yuta tightened his grip on Sicheng. "Baby it's okay. How long has it been since you've been up really high?"

"Years. Alot of ye _ars."_ Yuta's voice went up when they began to move and pressed himself closer to Sicheng. "Yuta you should've told me earlier. " 

"No no," Yuta looked at him, "Just need to calm myself down ." Sicheng kissed his boyfriend's hair and did what Yuta told him used to make his nerves stop from bouncing. "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey," The car began to go higher, yet Yuta felt better. "You'll never know dear how much I love you. Please don't take my Yuta away." Sicheng's english was nowhere near perfect, but it was more beautiful than anything what he was listening to now. "Can you look out the window?" Yuta looked at his boyfriend warily. "W-why?"

"I want to show you why I wanted to bring you up here, if you can't I'll describe it to you. We're about to be up at the peak." The Japanese moved over , took a breath, and looked out the window. 

He couldn't believe what he saw. 

There were about a million lights illuminating the fair below. Shades of colors were strategically placed around to make a rainbow of color in almost every shade. Even that wasn't everything, the colors were displayed to make little patterns all around. "This is why I love the fair. It always makes me feel something I can't explain inside. I wanted you to feel the way I do when I'm up here." And Yuta felt it too, from every part of his body. "I think. I think it's the feeling I get when I'm with you." Sicheng smiled softly at his boyfriend while putting his arms around his waist. "Sicheng is this the part where we kiss." The Chinese smiled, "I believe we do." 

Yuta isn't going to lie and say he's never kissed Sicheng, but he's never kissed Sicheng while hanging over a crazy evil dangerous machine, but he didn't feel afraid. He felt calmer and even happy. Yuta pressed the kiss deeper until the car moved and they broke apart. They then realized it was the end of the ride. The worker came and opened their door, and Sicheng led him out of the machine that wasn't so scary to him anymore. 

"You enjoy your ride?" The lady asked as they walked back, "Yeah. I think he did." Yuta smiled. "I liked it so much we can may be do it again. But you might have to sing to me when we get back on there." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Taki-taki is a shortened version of Yuta's nickname Takoyaki prince


	21. Bathroom wall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Idols yes, superhuman no. There's only so much they can take.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slow updates again because thanksgiving break is over
> 
> This is angsty

Yuta isn't going to lie and say he didn't love being an idol, this was his dream since he came out the womb. He was ready to go as far as he needed to debut. He was prepared for having to spend alot of his time learning Korean. He was prepared for the diets , and the workouts , and the schedule. He was prepared for giving up some of his freedom to get here.

He wasn't prepared for this. 

Yuta wasn't ready for falling in love with his bandmate , and having the love returned. He wasn't prepared for the others to accept him and Sicheng, but he wasn't mad. He was relieved in fact when their manager said they could still be together after he found out. Just the public couldn't know, and at first Yuta was okay with it. He knew that it could cost their futures if they made a slip to show a little more than average fanservice.

Unfortunately Yuta didnt prepare himself for the ainxiety that came with being an idol, the intense hate and the worry that each song could be his last. And what once was okay; he now hated having to hide what he and Sicheng had, pretend that he didn't want to hold Sicheng's hand during interviews or kiss him senseless when they won awards. Pretend that he didn't love him, because the world couldn't accept it. It wasn't just him, there were others in other groups he's seen with the same look as him, even Sicheng himself carried the look at times. 

No amount of training could've prepared Yuta for what he felt when he sees Sicheng crying. To see him after dancing barely able to stand, and to see the brokenness in his eyes. Everytime he'd tell Sicheng that he could always leave if he wanted, but Sicheng was stubborn and would say that he could do it. Yuta knew he could, but he also knew that Sicheng's family wasn't as accepting as his NCT family. Yuta was strong for Sicheng. 

But nothing on this planet prepared Yuta for the feeling when he broke inside. He could only press away his emotions for so long. It was like a slingshot of sorts. The more pain he pushed back, the more force they had, and then they would shoot back at him when he didn't expect it. Like now.

He had just got back from his ungodly schedule that didn't include Sicheng or any other members for that matter, promoting some brands that he didn't remember nor care for. He was just going to the bathroom to take a look at himself, it was late and he hoped he didn't look half dead as he was walking past the others on his way to the dorms. Then it hit him. All the years he'd been in Korea and things are still foreign, his family was in a different country, and no matter how hard he tried he would never be perfect and-

There was a knock on the bathroom door, "Yuta?" 

_Sicheng._

"Winko what are you doing up? It's later than late and we're busy tomorrow." Yuta didn't want his boyfriend to see him like this, scared and worried about his future when he needed to be strong. He tried to will Sicheng to just let him be and get it out his system, but relationship gods didn't seem to be caring on his preference at the moment because Sicheng walked through. "What's wrong?" Yuta shook his head, not trusting his voice to agree with the lie he was trying to pass. "I know something's wrong Yuta. We are not leaving this bathroom until you tell me." Yuta knew that Sicheng wouldn't let up, even if they were in here until it was time to start their schedule the next day. So he told Sicheng everything that had been bothering from today and all the days in the past.

 

Yuta doesn't cry when he talks about things like this, he doesn't cry from pressure. He shuts down completely. The first time he did in NCT he had stopped eating, he was quieter off camera, and didn't tell anyone. Everyone saw what was happening, but he waved everyone off even Sicheng. Not until Yuta's mom called and had to calm him down and literally forced him to eat, keeping her over the phone as he ate. He hasn't pulled himself back into what he's calling a stop since. Sicheng had always been there to help him stop him from doing anything again. " Thank you. Yuta."

"What for?"

"For telling me instead of having a stop. I know you would've done it with all of that on you, but why didn't you tell me sooner, or at least call your mom." 

"I know how hard you've been working and I don't want to bother you with my problems." Sicheng kissed his boyfriend's cheeks. "I don't care how busy I am. Tell me anyway, you can grab me out of the recording studio and I'd listen without fail. I'd do anything for you to be happy. I love you too much for you to be like this." Yuta smiled as Sicheng hugged him tightly. 

They jumped apart from the sound of an awkward cough. "As beautiful as this is, I have to pee and Mark is using the other bathroom ," Johnny was standing in the doorway of the bathroom, looking genuinely touched at the moment in front of him. "Don't do this to Sicheng again Yuta, he looked like a lost puppy without you today." 

"I'll kill you and the rest of the band will cover for me." The Chinese said as they moved out to let Johnny in. "You wouldn't even kill a fly yesterday." Johnny said from behind the closed door, and Sicheng didn't reply as he walked hand in hand with Yuta to his room. Yuta slipped under the covers before Sicheng did the same, wrapping his arms around Yuta's waist to keep him close. "I love you Nakamoto Yuta. I meant what I said earlier, about doing anything even if it meant giving up this to be with you." 

"You don't have to Sicheng. And don't say you'll stay and I'll go because it takes a toll on me. I've wanted this since I was a kid, we get what we want but with a price to pay, but that's for everyone. Besides," Yuta faced Sicheng, "Who would be there for you when you don't feel happy?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Love all idols, you never know how hard they have it.


	22. Forgetful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This did not go as planned, but all ends well.

Yuta felt odd when he woke up to his now fiancee next to him, still sleeping sweetly. He brushed the feeling away and turned to the other person in the bed. Sicheng's face had a content look on his face, a look Yuta wouldn't trade for anything else on this planet. 

A few minutes later the sleeping boy opened his almond eyes to be met with slim ones. "Morning Yuta. Breakfast. "

"But that requires effort I don't have in the morning." Sicheng smiled, "Fine. I'll eat Miso by myself. 

Yuta was suddenly awake.

As Sicheng made breakfast Yuta hugged him from behind, placing soft kisses down his neck. "At this rate you will never get breakfast." Sicheng said with a smile. "I wouldn't mind waiting for now." Sicheng turned to Yuta. "Well you made me get up, now you're going to eat it with me."

"You were the one who said you wanted breakfast!" 

"My intention was for you to make it for me, but you forced me to do it myself. Slave in the kitchen to make-" Yuta pressed his lips to the others, wrapping his arms around Sicheng. "Let's eat breakfast, then we'll maybe do something else later." Yuta said with a smirk. "Aish, you drive a hard bargain Yuta but we'll see." The Japanese boy smiled and sat while Sicheng brought the food. "You're cooking dinner though." Yuta nodded and realized last night that they didn't even discuss when they would get married. "I think maybe we should have a spring or summer wedding, I know you don't really like winter because it's bitterly cold here. What do you think?" 

Sicheng looked at him for a few moments before laughing. "Yuta, babe I love you. But we haven't even gotten married love." Yuta raised an eyebrow. Then he realized what the odd feeling was this.

_Shit. That's what he forgot to do yesterday._

That's why he didn't remember what it felt like to propose, or whether he or Sicheng cried more. Because he didn't even do it. Then Sicheng's eyes widened in realization that Yuta didnt see. "I'll be right back Winko." He went to their room and opened his dresser drawer and pulled out the velvet box in which the diamond crusted band was still inside. "Ah, I'm a dumb fuck. But I'm Sicheng's dumb fuck." He rolled his eyes at himself and held the box behind his back.

He walked back into the kitchen where Sicheng was desperately trying to compose himself after figuring out he was forgotten to be proposed to. He wasn't mad, it was hilarious, and he wouldn't ever let Yuta hear the end of this. Yuta took a deep breath before going to Sicheng. Yuta kissed his forehead and clasped his hand. "Dong Sicheng, yes I messed up yesterday. We've had many times we didn't know what was right and what was wrong, but we've made it through them all. I love you more than life itself and I don't ever want to leave your side. You mean the most in the world to me," Yuta got down on his knee, "So please give me the honor of becoming mine."

Even though Sicheng knew about what was going to happen, nothing he had ever seen let him know about the feeling that he got when Yuta proposed. His heart swelled at his hilariously forgetful boyfriend who still made him get all tingly inside. "Yes , yes, a hundred times yes. Of course I will marry you Yuta." Yuta smiled and slipped the ring onto Sicheng's finger, smiling giddyly at his finally now fiancee.

"And to answer your question. I would most definitely prefer a spring wedding." 


	23. Why can't I say I love you PT 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuta is finally going to yell his best friend Sicheng how he feels about him, but the universe must screw him over first.

"You gotta tell him man," was what Mark told him when he saw Yuta looking at his best friend Sicheng walk off to get lunch. "I mean he's obviously in love with you too, so why won't you suck it up and ask him out?"

"If he likes me so much why won't he ask me out?"

"Maybe because he can't speak Korean or Japanese well enough to? You know, because he can't? " Mark was right, Sicheng could understand Korean but could barley speak it. I mean, the poor boy can't order a coffee without having to do charades. It's cute, but it also makes it impossible for him to tell the other how he feels. So Yuta has to do it. 

Yuta really doesn't want to do it.

99% of Yuta's mind knew Mark was right, it's was so painfully obvious it hurt. But there was that 1% that was killing Yuta. Ask anyone, Yuta was known for second guessing himself at least once a day over something small. If he actually needed to stop and thing he wouldn't do it. Johnny calls it stupidity, Yuta calls it using his head when he finds it convienent. Doesn't matter because he was currently having all these what ifs. Like what if Sicheng's like that to everyone, or what if he doesn't really like him and he's just leading him on? (Of course Sicheng's too sweet to actually do that, but paranoid Yuta doesn't know that.) 

 Mark looked at his friend and rolled his eyes. "Hey Sicheng! Yuta has something to tell you!" Yuta has never wanted to punch Mark more than in that moment. Sicheng looked over at him from speaking rapid fire Chinese to his friends and tilted his head that cute way he does when he needs someone to repeat what they said, "Nothing! He didn't say anything!" Sicheng came over anyway and Yuta screamed internally. "What Mark needs?" The Canadian poked him as if to say  _hurry the fuck up._

"I want to be more than friends Sicheng. " The boy looked at him for a moment probably translating in his head before smiling at the Japanese boy. "Yuta! I thought we were." 

"Really?" Sicheng nodded happily, "You are my best friend." Yuta felt the color drain from his face. That 1% percent just grew to around 27%. "That is what more than friends is yes?" Yuta nodded. Technically the wasn't incorrect, best friends were more than just friends, but best friends don't give eachother kisses. Best friends is great but not what Yuta wants to to be with Sicheng, but it's better than enemies. "Yes Sicheng, we are best friends. I was just making sure." Sicheng smiled before hugging the boy, "Good. I be very lost without you." And went back to sit with his friends.

Yuta put his head down on the table. "I told you. He doesn't like me." Mark pat him on the shoulder, "Maybe it was just lost in translation. Try again." Yuta shook his head. "Not today, maybe later. Maybe."

Because somewhere in him, Yuta wanted Mark to be right

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AIGO THANK YOU ALL FOR 2000+ READS! I honestly didn't think this would get past 200 so I love you all very much. I would also like to thank Sicheng and Yuta for being so fucking gay or I would not be able to write any of these


	24. Why can't I say I love you PT 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuta is pretty sure the universe hates him, because Dong Sicheng really needs to take the hint. (But then, the universe figures it all out )

This time, there was  _no possible **way**_ Yuta could get lost in translation. Yuta had it all written out, everything he would say broken down to the point Sicheng would totally understand. He'd even say it in Chinese if it helped. Today the amusement park was in town, and Yuta had a plan. Yuta , Johnny, Sicheng, Mark, and Ten would all go. Then after a while he'd bring Sicheng to one of the games, win something for him, than express his undying love for the Chinese boy. Everything would go according to plan.

Nothing went according to plan.

Granted, Johnny and Ten didn't know about what was going on, but he expected that they'd go off on their own. Yuta forgot however, that everyone loves Sicheng. It seemed to be programmed into them to protect and make him happy 24/7. Personally, Yuta wanted that job for himself.

While they were walking and looking for good rides Sicheng asked him a question, "How many do you love?" Yuta cocked his head, "Like how many times have I been in love?"

"Yes."

"Well I've been in love three times." Sicheng looked at him, "Are you love today?" 

"Yes." Sicheng stared at him like he was going to say something, and Yuta began to think  _Holy shit holy shit does he like me back holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy-_ "Okay! "

Okay.

Yuta just indirectly kinda sorta admitted to being in love with the boy, and he gets an okay? Everything inside of him just deflated, and he stared at Sicheng for a second before sighing. "Okay. Yeah." Sicheng quirked an eyebrow. "Did I say mean words? I did not mean for you look so sad." The Japanese shook his head quickly, the last thing he wanted was to make the other upset. "No no no! You're lovely." Immideadly Sicheng's face lit up, "Thank you! You are my best friend." 

 _I don't wanna be your friend,_ Yuta thought,  _I wanna smother you in fucking kisses you sunshine ball._ That's more or less been what the boy has thought since they met. Then he sees Mark, Johnny, and Ten come up to them - wait. Yuta didnt even notice they left! His chance. Gone. "Guys the games are over here!" Johnny said holding an oversized tiger and smiling. "Did you win for Ten?" Sicheng asked. "Nope. I won it for him." Chittaphon said before dragging the other two towards the games.

The balloon popping game. Yuta's favorite game and biggest enemy. You see, Yuta has never once won the big prize on this game sent from Satan himself. No matter how hard he tried he would always end up missing the last balloon no matter how many there were. Someone could line up a billion, and Yuta would pop all put the last one. He knew this. He knew it would be a waste of time and tickets to do it. It could also quite possibly leave him embarrassed. "Dude don't do it." Mark said warily, having known Yuta long enough to know he never won what he wanted and hoped he'd listen.

He gave the vendor his tickets.

He got four darts for three balloons, this should be totally easy, but based on what I've just told you about our Yuta it will not be. The first two were easy, but with one of his last two darts he missed the third. If he missed, then Mark would laugh at him for eight years straight, but if he won... Yuta took a breath, and fired the dart.

The sound of a balloon popping never sounded better to Yuta's ears. He didn't care what other people thought was important for a person, this would forever be the most defining moment in his life. He looked over all the big stuffed animals before laying his eyes on the one he knew Sicheng would love. Ryan from kakao talk. Sicheng didn't know the lion had a name, he only found out that app existed a few months ago, but he loved sending emoticons of Ryan. "That one please." 

"You won?" Mark said when Yuta came running towards he and Sicheng. "I won!" The Canadian looked to Sicheng, "He has never won the big prize before. I'm surprised he didn't go into shock." Yuta rolled his eyes before holding the Ryan out to Sicheng, "I won him for you." Sicheng took the lion and smiled brightly, before pressing a kiss to Yuta's lips. "Wait, since when are you guys dating?" Mark said to an equally confused Yuta. "We are not?" Sicheng asked softly. Yuta shook his head slowly, still trying to wrap his mind around the fact Sicheng believed they were dating. "But when we all go place, Yuta only sit by me. And when I asked you favorite season, you call me handsome before telling me fall." Yuta remembered their seasons conversation, and then remembered something about the Chinese language.

Tones are important.

Shuāi = fall

 Shuài = handsome

Originally he was trying to tell Sicheng that fall was his favorite season in Mandarin, but gave up when he saw the goofy smile and red on Sicheng's face when he said it, and spoke Korean instead. Sicheng was smiling because he thought Yuta was calling him handsome. "And you called me best friend." Yuta's eyes widened in realization. Sicheng thought best friend in Korean meant boyfriend, and Yuta calls him his best friend at least one a day. "And you give me hugs always and you make me foods and make me-" He didn't know the word, so Sicheng gave a bright smile. 

"Sicheng, best friend is a friend who you are very close to. Boyfriend is someone who gives you hugs always and buys gifts and makes you smile..." He trailed off, he had been indirectly acting like his boyfriend since January. "I call my mom and tell her "Mom a pretty boy love me, I love him too." But I made mistake, I am sorry." He's never seen Sicheng so heartbroken, not even when he talks about China and his family. And it was because Yuta couldn't get his shit together.

"Sicheng, I didn't know you thought we were dating, but that doesn't mean I don't like you." Sicheng looked back up from the ground, "What?" 

"I wished we were dating for a long time, like when we first met. But I was scared you wouldn't like me back so I didn't say anything. I would've been a much better boyfriend if I had known."

"You like me?"

"Very much yes."

"If I ask, would you be my boyfriend?"

"Very much yes."

"Will you be my boyfriend now?" Yuta smiled, "Of course Dong Sicheng. "

"Does that mean I can kiss you now?" Yuta leaned upward, "Very much yes. "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As someone who is learning Mandarin I can assure you 200% tones are super important. If you don't say something exactly how it's pronounced you could be saying dumpling instead of sleep, or fall instead of handsome


	25. 2018

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My thank you gift to you guys lovely readers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for letting me be a part of your 2017 my babies.

Sicheng believed he was the happiest man alive. 

He and Yuta were currently at Johnny's house for his annual new years party. (He's been holding them since he was a sophomore in high school, the only thing that's changed is the location seeing as he's a full grown adult mostly and has his own house now.) A big group always undoubtedly came, and this year was no different. Their closest friends of course were here. Taeyong and Taeil off to the side, Mark and Donghyuk sitting together, Ten watching th countdown while Johnny was being an amazing host and making sure everyone was happy and we'll fed, until he got to Sicheng and Yuta. "Don't fuck on my couch." Yuta gasped dramatically, "We would never do that."

"I had to set fire to my other one, and we all know who's fault that was." He shouted in Taeil's direction. "It was one time!"

"I liked my couch! I know you guys most likely wouldn't do that but still, you know because TAEIL CAN'T KEEP IT IN HIS FRICKIN PANTS!" After a good battle of incoherent sounds Johnny gave up and looked at the t.v. "Five minutes to midnight people, get with whoever you want to attempt to make out with." Sicheng saw people scoot closer together, and Johnny then sat by Ten. "Winko?"

"Hm? "

"You know that Christmas gift I said I got for you but it worked better on new years? Well hopefully it'll finish by the time the countdown ends." Sicheng cocked his head to the side, "What do you mean?" Yuta clasped his hands over Sicheng's. "Dong Sicheng, when I moved here I was small and in desperate need of friends. Luckily you came to my rescue. It only took me a few days to realize I wanted to keep you in my life, and a few more to find out I wanted you to be with me." Yuta slid from the couch to one knee, and Sicheng knew what was happening. "Oh my god..."

"I never want to see you hurt, or anything less than the brightness I see now. You mean more to me than life itself. I don't ever want to let you go. This has been a year of happiness and I want an even better one next year so please," Yuta pulled a velvet box out of his back pocket and opened it to reveal the ring, "Stay with me." By then Sicheng was crying, he never saw himself as someone who could be loved this way, and he'd want nothing more than to be with Yuta. "Yes, yes, yes! Of course yes!"

And then Yuta broke into this smile brighter than the one that he gave Sicheng when he said yes the first time, and that made the Chinese boy start crying again because he was just so happy and so lucky. Yuta stood up and put the ring on Sicheng's finger. He didn't bother admiring it because Sicheng still couldn't get over the fact he was just proposed to. He saw his friends in the background clapping, but it felt like it was muffled. Then he heard. "Ten! " 

"Nine!"

"Eight!" Yuta held Sicheng closer. "Six!"

"Five!"

"Four!"

"Three!"

"Two!"

"One." Yuta breathed before kissing Sicheng. It was soft and said everything Yuta said in the proposal and more. Eventually they began to smile into the kiss and broke apart. "I love you Dong Sicheng, more than anything I have."

And at that moment , Sicheng knew he was the happiest man alive. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave my boys questions as they ring in the new year! Anything and everything!


	26. Kindergarten Boyfriend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Yuta sees his win-win crying on the playground, he just doesn't know what to do

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kid fic! This will be the softest shit you've ever read in this collection

"Johnny? Where is Win-win? " Yuta tugged on the 1st grader who was at recess with the youngers. "Sicheng is by the swings I think." Win-win is actually named Sicheng, but Yuta doesn't know how to pronounce that, so Sicheng let's him call Win-win. Only Yuta can call him that. (Well that's what Yuta tells everyone who's tried.) 

Yuta is five and a half, and Sicheng is five. And Yuta thinks Sicheng is the prettiest person in the world, with the prettiest smile and prettiest eyes ever. And Yuta knows Sicheng thinks the same, because he heard him say it to Mark. Well Johnny told him that Sicheng said it, and Johnny knows everything because he's in first grade. But also Sicheng holds Yuta's hand everyday to lunch, and gives him his ice cream on Fridays so he can have one extra, only to get it back because Yuta shares it with him.

Johnny says that that means Sicheng is his couple. And Johnny knows everything so it must be true.

Today Yuta didn't see Win-win after lunch, which is weird because he always goes with him to recess even if they don't always play together. Maybe he had walked to recess with  _Kun_ and that's why he left Yuta alone. He went to the swings and not only saw that Sicheng was alone, but he was also crying. "Win-winnie! Wait, why are you sad?" The Chinese boy sniffed for a little longer, "Kyuhyun s-saw us holding hands and s-said that I can't be a couple with you." 

"Why not?"

"B-because I am a boy, a-and you're a boy too!" Kyuhyun was a third grader. Yuta didn't like Kyuhyun all that much before, now he super didn't like Kyuhyun. "Kyuhyun is a butthead." Win-win gasped, "Yuta that's a bad word." Yuta didn't care. Yuta wanted to push Kyuhyun into the mulch. Except that Kyuhyun was bigger than him. And had bigger friends that would push Yuta and Sicheng harder, and then Sicheng would cry even more. "But he made you sad Sicheng. So he is a really big butthead." 

Then he gave Sicheng a kiss on his forehead. The younger looked at him through teary eyes, "What did that do?" 

"My sister gave one to her couple when she was sad. I think it is supposed to make you feel better. It made Lilly smile when my sister gave one. Did it work?" Sicheng smiled and nodded. "Thank you! Do I have to give one back?" Yuta shrugged, "Sometimes Lilly gives them back, but I don't think you have to all the times." Sicheng nodded again, as if being given special information. "Should we ask Johnny if we can still be couple?" Johnny isn't a butthead, so if there really is a rule saying that he and Sicheng can't be a couple then Yuta will just have to write to the president of the universe. 

He's never met the president of the universe, but he'll talk to him for Sicheng. 

They ran back over to where the first grader was playing with his friend Ten. "Hyung I have a question!" 

"Yep?" 

"Um, are boys allowed to be in a couple with another boy? Because Kyuhyun said you can't. An-and he made Win-win cry!" Most everyone loved Win-win, and making him cry was punishable by jail (or that's at least what Yuta thinks should happen). "My brother is in fourth grade and he has recess with Kyuhyun, I'll tell him to make him leave you guys alone." Ten said defiantly, holding up his action figure. Yuta thought that would be amazing, but he still didn't get his answer. "Johnny hyung, are we allowed to or not? I don't want Win-win to break any rules." Johnny was quiet for a moment, "Do you want to be a couple with Sicheng? "

"Yes!"

"Sicheng do you want to be a couple with Yuta?"

"Yep!" 

"For how long?" Yuta wasn't very good with numbers yet, and neither was Sicheng, so the Chinese boy asked another question. "Johnny what is the biggest number?"

"Infinity a billion and three." Yuta didn't know why the number stopped at three instead of a zero, but he also couldn't count backwards so he can't be the one to argue with numbers. "I want to stay a couple with Yuta for infinity a billion and three years."

"Ooh! Ooh! Me too!" Johnny nodded, "Then you can be couple as long as you love eachother. Like your mommy and daddy do. That is super duper important." Sicheng smiled brightly before turning to Yuta. "Guess what? My mommy and daddy said we can be a couple for infinity a billion and three as long as your mommies say it is okay!" 

"I'll ask them when they come get me today, but I'm thinking they will say yes." Sicheng clapped his hands together happily as the teacher signaled that it was time to go back inside. Yuta smiled when Sicheng put his little hand in the others. "Winko?"

"Yeah?"

 "What will happen after infinity a billion and three ends?" Sicheng held his hand tighter, "We will just make a bigger number silly."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have nothing against Kyuhyun irl it was just the first name that came to mind when I was writing
> 
> Why can't everyone be as woke as this Johnny?


	27. Cookies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "...I don't know that much about you other than that you bake when you're stressed..."

Dong Sicheng. 23, does his work on time, never late to classes, and likes baking. Also Yuta lives right next door to him and is no stranger to him knocking on his door and asking him if he'd like a batch. For no cost other than giving the boy company for ten minutes. They didn't know much about eachother, except that Yuta's favorite type of cookie was chocolate and that Sicheng's is sugar cookie.

And one day he came with more cookies. Yuta was heading to his apartment when there's a basket waiting for him. It wasn't abnormal for Sicheng to drop them off if Yuta wasn't home. He smiled and picked up the basket and saw an assortment of cookies along with his personal favorite.

Then the next day there were two baskets, Yuta just thought that he had some left over and didn't know where to put them. Then he realized the baker had left him a small chocolate cake as well. He then ate it for dinner and thought nothing of it, telling Sicheng the next day that the cake was good. Which led him to get them more often. (He's not complaining of course, the cake tasted like heaven.) But then it began to get out of hand.

Sicheng began to give Yuta the baskets almost every other day, and Yuta never said no, Sicheng's face was so hopeful everytime he held one out. It seemed like the Japanese boy had more sweets than actual food nowadays. And he needed to consume all of them (to make room for more obviously). 

So on Saturday he grabbed his friends Mark and Johnny and brought them to his apartment to discuss the problem at hand. "...And he keeps bringing them over, so what do?" 

"Two things. One: you have a problem with saying no to him. Two: what's his name again? " Johnny said while eating his way through the cookies. "You'd have a problem with saying no to him too if you saw his face. And his name is Sicheng." Mark looked up, "Oh! Sicheng! Yeah he bakes when he's stressed. This one time he gave me so many I had more than healthy food. It was just before midterms last year. Go talk to him." 

"Why do I have to do it? You know him!" Mark shrugged, "Kind of. But, I don't live next to him. Also you told me to suffer when I locked myself out of the house." Karma really does bite you in the butt then. "Johnny?"

"I don't know him, but I will help you get rid of these cookies. Good luck. Don't be awkward!" The two left with almost every basket of sweets. "I'm not awkward. Ever." Yuta said to the door. Except that's a lie and Yuta sucks at talking to strangers. Like, he's terrible. Making quick conversation about where he is and things like that is okay, but talking to someone who he doesn't know anything about other than his favorite type of cookie? Not so much. 

And then there was a knock on the door. "Yuta! It's me!" Sicheng's voice rang through his apartment.  _'How could someone that happy sounding be so stressed out?'_ He thought as he went to unlock the door, to get his food. "Thanks Sicheng. "

"Anytime!" He looked into his apartment, "You ate all of them already? I guess I'll just need to up my game then. See you tomorrow!" 

"Actually," He grabbed Sicheng's wrist, "Um, I don't know that much about you other than that you bake when you're stressed. And you used to give me cookies every now and then, but now you're giving me some every day. Do you need a hug or you need to talk about it?" Yuta watched as Sicheng's face slowly fell into an almost frown. "Sicheng I'm sorry I didn't mean anything please don- mph." Yuta was engulfed in a hug. "Can I take you up on both those offers?" 

* * *

 

Yuta waited patiently until Sicheng was done crying and talking, rubbing small circles on his back to keep him calm. He knew school was stressful, but he didn't think it would've done this. When Sicheng was finished Yuta got up and grabbed something that normally worked when he was stressed. "This works for me, maybe it will work for you." It was small and round with cracks on its flat golden top. "Is this a cookie? Isn't this a cookie I've given you?" Yuta nodded. "If school or anything has me feeling like you, I eat a cookie or a something of yours. Like if some of my homework has me in literal shambles, oh look a cookie. And then I can get back to my work for the amount of time said cookies taste is in my mouth." Sicheng laughed as he took the sugar cookie. "I think you're a sugar junkie."

"Well it made you laugh didn't it? Which means something is going right." Sicheng took a bite of his cookie. "Okay, this is great. Are you sure I made this? Because I'm pretty sure what I make is worse."

"Do you actually not eat your own food?" Sicheng shook his head, "If I do, I'd probably eat everything. Then what would I have to give you?" Yuta smiled. "You know I will never turn down a basket from you, but if you ever need to talk to someone instead of spending your life savings on flour, my door is always open for you." Sicheng smiled back to the other, "Thanks Yuta. But later you'll have to tell me about you, and maybe we'll get to know eachother better. " Yuta nodded in agreement as he let the other out. 

It took him a few seconds, but then he realized Sicheng took back his basket. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and comments are always 200% appreciated!


	28. And I will love you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuta promised Sicheng he wouldn't leave him. And this time would be no different.

Having a knock on his apartment at 3 a.m was not what Yuta expected. He grumbled and unlocked his door, but face dropped when he saw who was standing there. Sicheng. What was worse was that he was crying. "Winko, what happened? " He opened his arms and the boy fell in, holding onto him for dear life. Then did Yuta notice he was holding a small backpack. "I-I told them and-" Sicheng cut himself off with a sob. " _Oh_... Oh baby..." He held him tighter.

* * *

 

Sometime they had migrated to the couch where Yuta kept Sicheng in his arms, the boy not even wanting him to leave to get him some water. "I'll get some later, but not right now. Please stay. Please." He curled himself even tighter into his arms. "I'm not leaving you, I promise I won't be going anywhere." Yuta placed soft kisses on the side of his face, until Sicheng suddenly turned his face to kiss his lips. He didn't think the Chinese man would want one considering he was the one who cause the problem. Yuta kissed him until Sicheng broke it off, shuddering as he blinked back tears. "Do you want to talk about it now? You don't have to, we can wait until the morning." Sicheng shook his head. "Now. Now will be better."

Yuta is 20 years old and in his first year of college, Sicheng is 18 and in his last year of high school. They'd been dating for about a good year now, and were happy. Well, they seemed happy. "You know how I told you one day I was gonna tell them? I did today. I thought that maybe it would be the age that would throw them off, that would be easy to explain and get out of the way. But somewhere deep down I knew that age wouldn't be the real issue. When I told them you were a boy though, that's when they stopped. My dad left and went upstairs, and my mom looked at me. She looked at me like I killed a part of her Yuta. I tried to say something but she gave me that look like I'd said enough," Sicheng closed his eyes as if tying to forget a bad dream. "Are you sure you want to talk about this right no-"

"Yes. When my dad came back down he was holding this bag. He threw it at me and told me to get out and come back when I have my life together. Mama began to cry, and I ran. I ran as fast as I could to you because I know I can't go back. I failed them Yuta, I fucking failed." 

"Hey hey," Yuta held his face in his hands, "Don't call yourself that. You aren't a failure. You're beautiful and mean more to me than I'll ever be able to explain to you," Yuta didn't speak, but he had an idea, a terribly painful and heartbreaking idea, "Leave me." Sicheng looked at him. "W-what?" 

"You heard me. If I'm not here to keep you away from them, you can go back. You can say you cut things off and have your family again, and be happy." Sicheng stared at him through teary eyes for a few moments, then he gripped Yuta's shirt. "You-you promised! You promised you wouldn't leave me." 

"I know what I said-"

"Then keep the promise! Please don't leave me alone." 

"You won't be alone, you'll be with your parents." Sicheng shook his head violently, "Even if I go back, how are you so sure they won't just throw me out again anyway? They know now, who says they will be the same just because you're gone?" Oh. Yuta didn't think about that. "Do you love me?" 

"Of course Winko." 

"Then let me stay with you." 

"But what about getting you to school, and what about-" Sicheng placed his lips over Yuta's to shut him up. "We can worry about that tomorrow, but you haven't answered if I can stay or not." Yuta nodded, "You can stay. I made you a promise didn't I? I promise you will be safe. And I will love you no matter what. " Sicheng smiled softly and rested his head on Yuta's lap.

For better or worse, Sicheng was Yuta's and Yuta was Sicheng's. They would just have to see how this road goes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thinking about maybe turning this into a series, what do you guys think? Let me know down below


	29. Description

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From the way Sicheng understands the world, description is hard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bold : hand
> 
> Italics: Braille

Month 5

**"W.h.e.r.e A.r.e W.e?"**

**"J.a.p.a.n."**

**"I. K.n.o.w T.h.a.t, B.u.t W.h.e.r.e?"**

**"A. H.i.l.l."**

**"W.h.y?"**

**"C.a.u.s.e I. W.a.n.t U. T.o f.e.e.l I.t"**

**"W.h.a.t?"**

**"W.i.n.d."**

I cannot hear the wind, or see it, but I can feel it all. It is not too windy, just right. Yuta's hand is in mine and it is warm. 

**"W.h.a.t C.o.l.o.r I.s W.i.n.d?"**

**"N.o C.o.l.o.r W.e F.e.e.l W.i.n.d T.h.e S.a.m.e A.s Y.o.u"**

**"U. D.o?"**

I smile, knowing we have something in common. Wind. 

**"S.o.m.e.t.i.m.e.s T.h.o.u.g.h U. C.a.n H.e.a.r I.t"**

My smile fades. Wind still keeps us apart.

* * *

Month 8

**"Y.u.t.a"**

**"Y."**

**"I.s I.t H.a.r.d T.o B.e M.i.n.e C.a.u.s.e W.e H.a.v.e T.o T.a.l.k L.i.k.e T.h.i.s?"**

**"N."**

**"D.o N.o.t L.i"**

**"I.t I.s H.a.r.d T.o T.a.l.k, B.u.t N.o.t H.a.r.d T.o B.e Y.o.u.r.s"**

And then he kisses me. Yuta says you don't have to see or hear to kiss, just feel. I am good at feeling. And touching. And smelling. And tasting. I love kissing him. I wrap my arms around his neck and let them stay there, he puts his hands on my hips to rest. He kisses my neck too, it feels like heaven on earth. When he stops I place my lips on his neck. I sometimes cannot find my way there, but I did this time.

**"D.e.s.c.r.i.b.e H.o.w U. L.o.o.k F.o.r M.e"**

**"I. H.a.v.e B.r.o.w.n H.a.i.r, B.r.w.n E.y.e.s, S.m.a.l.l L.i.p.s-"**

**"L.i.e"**

**"N.i.c.e S.i.z.e L.i.p.s, R.e.d"**

**"L.i.p.s T.a.s.t.e L.i.k.e S.m.i.l.e.s"**

**"S.m.i.l.e.s D.o.n.t H.a.v.e T.a.s.t.e "**

**"L.i.e"**

* * *

 

Year 1

**"H.p.p.y A.n.i.v.e.r.s.a.r.y W.i.n.k.o"**

**"A.n.d T.o Y.o.u T.o"**

**"W.i.l.l Y.o.u S.t.a.y W.t.h M.e F.o.r.e.v.e.r?"**

**"I. C.a.n.t G.o A.n.y.w.h.r W.i.t.h.o.u.t U"**

**"U. K.n.o.w W.h.t I. M.e.a.n"**

**"I. W.i.l.l S.t.a.y U.n.t.i.l U. G.e.t B.o.r.e.d O.f M.e"**

He kisses my hand before talking again.

**"I. W.i.l.l N.e.v.e.r B.o.r.e O.f Y.o.u M.y L.o.v.e"**

I smile at the lie, how can one not bore of someone like me? But the lie feels nice.

* * *

 

Year 1 month 8

**"W.h.a.t D.o I. L.o.o.k L.i.k.e?"**

**"B.e.a.u.t.i.f.u.l"**

**"N. R.e.a.l.l.y"**

**"B.l.n.d.e H.a.i.r, P.r.e.t.t.y L.i.p.s,**   **A.l.m.o.n.d E.y.e.s"**

**"M.y E.y.e.s L.k.k L.i.k.e N.u.t.s?"**

**"Y."**

His hand left mine and almost panicked. But then he came back, and I was okay.

**"P.u.t T.h.i.s U.p T.o Y.o.u.r E.y.e"**

I follow the instructions.

**"O."**

**"S.e.e? T.o.l.d Y.o.u"**

**"S.h.u.t U.p"**

He stops moving his hand, which is technically shutting up. No longer talking in my world. Then he moves again.

**"W.n.t M.u.s.i.c?"**

**"Y.e.s"**

I am not stupid, I know how to walk. I know where I am in our apartment living room and I know where our speaker is. I know when to move right to avoid crashing into tables and chairs. I am not helpless here inside. I can do things on my own inside of this place. 

I turn on the speaker and put my hand on the part where sound comes from, I wait for Yuta to turn on a song we like.

Then I feel it. And Yuta's hand is in mine.

**"E.n.g.l.i.s.h S.o.n.g"**

**"I. K.n.o.w I. C.a.n F.e.e.l T.h.e W.o.r.d.s"**

**"I. F.o.r.g.e.t I.t W.o.r.k.s T.h.a.t W.a.y"**

**"Y.u.t.a?"**

**"H.m?"**

**"S.o.d.a"**

**"O.r.a.n.g.e? I. H.a.v.e O.n.e N.x.t T.o M.e"**

**"G.i.m.m.i.e"**

The cold can is placed into my left hand, and I take a sip. It tastes like how orange should look.

* * *

 

 Year 2 month 3

**"W.h.a.t D.o C.o.l.o.r.s S.o.u.n.d L.i.k.e?"**

**"C.o.l.o.r.s D.o.n.t S.o.u.n.d. N.o S.o.u.n.d"**

**"J.u.s.t S.i.g.h.t?"**

**"Y."**

He doesn't talk, but his hand is tense like he wants to say something...

**"G.o O.n"**

**"W.h.y W.o.n.t Y.o.u L.e.t M.e M.a.r.r.y Y.o.u?"**

**"C.a.u.s.e I. W.a.n.t T.o H.e.a.r O.r S.e.e Y.o.u S.a.y T.h.e W.o.r.d.s T.o M.e"**

**"I. D.o.n.t T.h.i.n.k-"**

**"I. K.n.o.w, I. K.n.o.w I.t D.s.n.t E.x.i.s.t, N.e.v.e.r W.i.l.l"**

**"S.o I. C.a.n.t H.a.v.e Y.o.u?"**

**"I.m R.i.g.h.t H.e.r.e"**

**"I.f I.t W.e.r.e R.e.a.l, W.h.a.t W.o.u.l.d Y.o.u S.a.y?"**

**"Y.e.s, Y.e.s U.n.t.i.l Y.o.u H.a.t.e T.h.e W.o.r.d"**

Yuta pulls me into a hug I don't know why I'm receiving. He presses his lips to my shoulder,

 ** _"I love you."_** I can feel the way his lips move, and like this I can understand what he says. He has tried to teach me to talk, but the farthest I can go is making my lips move the way his do. He says no sound comes out.

_**"T.h.t W.a.y D.o.e.s N.o.t C.o.u.n.t"** _

* * *

Year 2 month 9

I am dreaming. In my dream I am crawling somewhere. Then my hands and feet feel wet, and I realize it is water. The water then is at my wrist, then my elbow. I want to scream for Yuta, but I don't know how. I stand up but hit my head on the low roof. The water is already up to my neck, my mouth, my nos-

I wake up, sitting up in our bed. I feel around for Yuta, but he is not there. I'm not surprised, he probably wanted someone better. Someone able. I rested my head on the head board. And I cried. I cried for a moment before I felt the bed dip and a pair of arms I recognize as Yuta's wraps around my waist. He wipes away my tears.

**"Y.o.u D.i.d N.o.t L.e.a.v.e M.e"**

**"I. W.i.l.l N.e.v.e.r L.e.a.v.e Y.o.u"**

**"Y.o.u W.i.l.l, I. C.a.n.n.o.t D.o A.n.y.t.h.i.n.g, I. A.m S.u.p.p.o.s.e.d T.o B.e A.l.o.n.e"**

_**"Then we will be alone together."** _

**"D.o U. M.e.a.n T.h.a.t?"**

**"F.o.r.e.v.e.r, I. L.o.v.e Y.o.u S.o M.u.c.h"**

**"I. L.o.v.e Y.o.u T.o.o"**

I do not know how he loves me, but I know he does.

* * *

 

Year 3 month 4

**"I. F.o.u.n.d I.t"**

**"W.h.a.t?"**

**"T.h.e. A.n.s.w.e.r T.o O.u.r P.r.o.b.l.e.m"**

He hands me a piece of paper and guides my hand to the raised bumps at the bottom. It is rare for things like this to have Braille. I read in my head and sign to Yuta,

**"C.a.n S.l.i.g.h.t.l.y R.e.s.t.o.r.e H.e.a.r.i.n.g, C.a.n S.l.i.g.h.t.l.y R.e.s.t.o.r.e S.i.g.h.t... W.h.a.t I.s T.h.i.s?"**

**"A. H.o.s.p.i.t.a.l, I. S.w.e.a.r T.h.e.y C.a.n D.o I.t"**

**"H.o.w M.u.c.h?"**

**"I. M.a.y H.a.v.e T.o C.u.t B.a.c.k O.n O.u.r T.r.i.p.s T.o J.a.p.a.n A.n.d C.h.i.n.a"**

**"A. L.o.t?"**

**"I.t I.s E.x.p.e.n.s.i.v.e, B.u.t W.o.r.t.h I.t"**

**"I. D.o.n.t W.a.n.t Y.o.u T.o H.a.v.e T.o S.p.e.n.d S.o M.u.c.h O.n M.e"**

**"I. W.a.n.t T.o, B.e.s.i.d.e.s I.t W.i.l.l J.u.s.t B.e A. L.o.t O.f S.a.v.i.n.g"**

**"Y.o.u A.r.e S.u.r.e I.t W.i.l.l W.o.r.k?"**

**"1.0.0 P.e.r.c.e.n.t, I. T.a.l.k.e.d T.o S.o.m.e O.f T.h.e P.e.o.p.l.e W.h.o H.a.d T.h.e S.u.r.g.e.r.y O.n M.y W.a.y T.o W.o.r.k"**

**"T.h.i.s M.e.an.s I. W.i.l.l B.e A.b.l.e T.o S.e.e A.n.d H.e.a.r? "**

**"F.o.r N.o.w P.i.c.k 1. T.h.e.n I. W.i.l.l S.a.v.e F.o.r S.e.c.o.n.d"**

**"I. D.o.n.t K.n.o.w Y.e.t"**

**"T.h.a.t I.s O.k, T.k.e U.r T.i.m.e"**

**"M.y H.a.n.d I.s T.i.r.e.d"**

**"W.a.n.t A. S.h.o.w.e.r?"**

**"I. C.a.n D.o B.y M.y.s.e.l.f"**

**"I. K.n.o.w, J.o.i.n.t S.h.o.w.e.r? S.a.v.e W.a.t.e.r"**

I smirk. Well, it's for a good cause but we might stay in there a little too long.

* * *

 

Year 3 month 11

**"H.i"**

I'm not talking to anyone in particular, or anyone at all. I'm talking to the cat that continues to come to our porch. At first we thought she would go away after we didn't feed her the first night, spoiler; we were wrong so now we feed her. When Yuta is working and I cannot go many places, I sit with her and feed her and talk to her. 

I believe she understands that I cannot do much, I don't know why but I believe she can. Somehow. 

**"O.n.e D.a.y I. W.i.l.l B.e A.b.l.e T.o S.e.e O.r H.e.a.r Y.o.u, T.e.n, I. P.r.o.m.i.s.e"**

She vibrates against my leg, Yuta says she makes a low sound. That Ten is also black. That is easy to imagine thankfully, for black is all I ever see. I have never been able to see, unlike my hearing. I used to hear, but it was not good. I could hear until I was four. All I remember is my mom laughing, and that is all I know how to make. But I can't do it on my own, I can't make myself laugh at the tap of a finger. Sometimes Yuta will tell me a joke, and it is funny enough to make me laugh. He says it's beautiful. I'll just have to take his word on it.

* * *

 

Year 4 month 5

 

**"S.o.o.n?"**

**"S.o.o.n"**

**"H.o.w S.o.o.n?"**

**"G.i.v.e M.e. 7. M.o.n.t.h.s"**

**"T.h.a.t S.h.o.r.t?"**

**"T.h.a.t I.s P.r.e.t.t.y L.o.n.g"**

**"I.m U.s.e.d T.o B.e.i.n.g L.i.k.e T.h.i.s, W.a.i.t.i.n.g W.o.n.t B.e H.a.r.d"**

**"I. K.n.o.w, B.u.t I. D.o.n.t W.a.n.t T.o W.a.i.t"**

**"W.h.y A.r.e U. M.o.r.e E.x.i.t.e.d T.h.a.n I?"**

**"B.e.c.a.u.s.e I.m G.o.n.n.a M.a.r.r.y Y.o.u S.o H.a.r.d"**

I laugh, I know I did because Yuta puts his ear up to my chest and listens for the vibrations that come with a laugh. I keep laughing, even though it is no longer funny. Now I am laughing because I am happy.

**"I. W.i.l.l M.a.k.e Y.o.u S.o H.a.p.p.y"**

I laugh again, because he already does.

* * *

 

Year 4 Month 10

**"I. A.m G.o.i.n.g T.o S.c.h.e.d.u.l.e Y.o.u.r A.p.p.o.i.n.t.m.e.n.t"**

**"S.o S.o.o.n? W.h.y?"**

**"I. W.i.l.l B.e P.a.y.i.n.g J.o.h.n.n.y B.a.c.k F.o.r.e.v.e.r"**

**"U. D.i.d.n.t H.a.v.e T.o"**

**"I. W.a.n.t.e.d T.o"**

**"H.o.w S.o.o.n T.h.e.n?"**

**"I. H.a.v.e.n.t E.v.e.n C.a.l.l.e.d Y.e.t L.o.v.e"**

**"O. W.e.l.l H.u.r.r.y U.p!"**

His hands don't leave mine, instead he prepositions himself in front of me and leans against my chest. I run my hands through his hair, it is soft. It smells like shampoo. I slowly grab some locks of hair and began to make a braid. It's probably bad but Yuta didn't mind and let's me do them anyway.

**"D.o U. B.e.l.i.e.v.e I.n M.i.r.a.c.l.e.s W.i.n.k.o?"**

**"I. D.o.n.t K.n.o.w"**

**"I. U.s.e.d T.o N.o.t"**

**"W.h.a.t H.a.p.p.e.n.e.d ?"**

**"I. M.e.t Y.o.u"**

**"N. I. A.m N.o.t S.p.e.c.i.a.l "**

**"Y.e.s Y.o.u A.r.e"**

**"N.o.t I.n A. G.o.o.d W.a.y"**

**"A.t F.i.r.s.t I. D.i.d.n.t T.h.i.n.k I. W.a.s.n.t W.o.r.t.h I.t, T.h.e.n I. G.o.t T.o M.e.e.t Y.o.u A.n.d F.a.l.l S.o I.n L.o.v.e W.i.t.h Y.o.u I. C.o.u.l.d C.r.y... I. W.i.l.l D.o A.n.y.t.h.i.n.g F.o.r Y.o.u"**

**"Y.o.u M.e.a.n T.h.e M.o.s.t T.o M.e"**

**"T.h.a.n.k Y.o.u"**

**"Y.o.u K.n.o.w I. D.o.n.t N.e.e.d T.o S.e.e O.r H.e.a.r T.o B.e H.a.p.p.y "**

**"B.u.t Y.o.u S.t.i.l.l W.a.n.t A.p.p.o.i.n.t.m.e.n.t R.i.g.h.t?"**

**"D.u.h"**

 

* * *

 

Year 5 month 2

**"R.e.a.d.y?"**

I nod instead of responding, I am ready but still nervous. Today is the day I get surgery. I decided on ears because I want to hear it. I want to hear everything in the world more than I want to see it. There are things I want to hear ; Ten purring, the wind, Yuta in general. I want to hear him more than anything in the world. 

**"I.t.s O.u.r T.u.r.n W.i.n.k.o "**

I stand up and Yuta grabs my hand to guide me along with my walking stick. Then I feel another, new hand in my right. The one Yuta was holding. Now it is a girls hand. At first I try to get out of the grip, but then she types.

**"H.i, I. A.m L.o.n.n.i.e A.n.d I. A.m A. N.u.r.s.e H.e.r.e, I. W.i.l.l G.u.i.d.e Y.o.u T.o T.h.e R.o.o.m"**

**"W.h.e.r.e I.s M.y B.o.y.f.r.i.e.n.d?"**

**"H.e I.s B.e.h.i.n.d Y.o.u, B.u.t I. M.u.s.t B.e N.e.a.r"**

We turn a corner and she sits me down, we must be in the room. Then her hand leaves mine and another male hand is in mine, too rough to be Yuta's. 

**"I. A.m D.o.c.t.o.r M.o.o.n A.n.d I. W.i.l.l B.e D.o.i.n.g Y.o.u.r P.r.o.c.e.d.u.r.e, B.u.t Y.o.u.r B.o.y.f.r.i.e.n.d W.a.n.t.s T.o S.a.y S.o.m.e.t.h.i.n.g"**

Doctor Moon's hand is replaced with Yuta's .

**"L.o.v.e Y.o.u, C.a.n.t W.a.i.t T.o T.e.l.l Y.o.u T.h.a.t"**

Switch again.

**"I. W.i.l.l W.a.n.t Y.o.u T.o C.o.u.n.t T.o T.e.n N.o.w"**

I begin to count, but when I am at three a needle picks my skin and I am out before I even count to seven.

* * *

 

Year 5 month 9

It has been some time since the surgery, which gave me not enough hearing on my own. Of course I knew that, the struggle was getting hearing aids strong enough for someone still almost totally deaf. Eventually we found them even though it took a shocking almost four months to do so. Now we were sitting in our room, Yuta placing them in my ear. 

I've never been more scared/nervous/exited in my life. What if it isn't as amazing as I think hearing to be? What if the world is scary? What if-

**"R.e.a.d.y F.o.r M.e T.o T.u.r.n T.h.e.m O.n?"**

**"D.o I.t"**

He closes the battery door. And then I hear everything. What I am hearing I don't know, but I know it is a voice. I'm beginning to cry, not because of bad things however. I am crying because I am so happy. I can hear. Holy shit I can hear. Wait. What are words? What do they sound like? I can't remember that much, nor do I know how to make them. Then Yuta is in my hand.

**"Y.u.t.a"**

"Yuta."

**"M.y N.a.m.e"**

"My name."

**"I. L.o.v.e Y.o.u"**

"I love you."

He places something in my hand, but he doesn't let me touch it to see what it is.

**"W.i.l.l Y.o.u M.a.r.r.y M.e?"**

"Marry me?" 

**"Y.e.s"**

Then he lets go of my hand and I feel what he had placed.

A ring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jesus you don't understand how long this one took to write.
> 
> Also, how was the first person? I never write like that so let me know!


	30. Not an update but an alert

Listen up folks; I'm going through the worst writer's block I've ever had. I don't want my one shot series to end with this  note so I need you. Yes, you the reader, to help me. Please comment below any ideas you might have that I could give this lovely ship. 

All I ask for you to comment is a short prompt, that  _must_ be finishable in four chapters or less. So no big long stories thanks.

Again; I love you guys and want to give you the best and things you'd like to read about, so why not give me your opinion? This also goes for future readers, please comment on this post if you have ideas! I won't be deleting this, so feel free to always come back if you ever get a new idea!

Thanks guys, ily ♡♤◇


	31. Sending a Sign

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sicheng thinks Yuta is the best thing since dancing, but his messages seem to keep getting scrambled on their way to the boy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was based on a prompt from yehetbunny! Thank you!

Sicheng has a problem. That problem has two eyes a beautiful smile and dances like a god. He also has a name, Nakamoto Yuta. And Sicheng had the biggest crush on him. It was his dance instructors assistant, so of course when he should be looking at her, Sicheng is busy looking at him.

The problem was, when it came to dropping hints, Yuta was dense at recognizing them. 

At first Sicheng though it was the fact he wasn't sending out a good message, but when he actually voiced his feelings for the other. It went like this.

_"Um Yuta?"_

_"Hm?" The other looked up from his phone. "I don't think I've been putting this the right way other times, but I like you."_

_"I like you too Sicheng. You're a good dancer and probably a great friend. Since I've been here you haven't shown me anything less than kindness and I hope I can do the same with helping your instructor." Sicheng's mouth dropped open. How did he not understand that? Perhaps English isn't his first language._

Since then, Sicheng doesn't even try to hide the heart eyes that come from him. Because even if someone told Yuta, he still wouldn't understand. A rocket could come crashing into his backyard, an alien could come out and tell Yuta directly that Sicheng liked him, and he'd still think he only wanted to be friends. 

And the worst part was, Yuta didn't try to hide his heart eyes, he was just so dense with love he couldn't see how Sicheng felt.

"How do I explain to him that I like him more than just as friends or assistant to student?" He asked his best friend and dance partner Ten one day. Practice was over and the two were looking for somewhere good to eat. "I don't know. I mean, the entire class can see the heart eyes you two give. The only person more dense than him is our actual instructor." Sicheng shook his head, "She knows, she just doesn't care. Anyway, how can I get it through his head? His beautiful, brown haired head. Why couldn't I fall for someone easier like you?"

"I am not easy!"

"Johnny sung you one song and you were whipped."

"Fair point. But look how we turned out, being easy isn't horrible. Unfortunately, you're whipped for a hard one." 

"He doesn't understand love at all," Sicheng waved his hands for emphasis, "I just don't know what else to do." Ten held the door open for him as they walked into a restaurant. They thought for a minute (mostly Sicheng, all Ten was doing was playing games on his phone) when Ten said, "If he doesn't understand normal tactics, use some that he will understand." Sicheng quirked an eyebrow, "Like what?"

"I don't know, didn't think that far. You're a big boy you can figure out your own problems." Sicheng rolled his eyes at his friend. He'd think about it after they ate.

 

* * *

 

 "Um Yuta? Could you stay behind and help me out with something?" It was two weeks from the conversation that they had. Sicheng had gotten his idea two days after, the extra time was used to actually hype himself up to do it. Hopefully Yuta wouldn't mind staying behind for it to happen.

Of course Yuta didn't mind, they both liked each other. Yuta was just so precious... and dense. He smiled and nodded, "Of course!" Sicheng watched as Ten walked out the door, shooting finger guns at the pair that Yuta didn't see since he had his back to him. 

Well, here goes nothing. 

"Actually... it isn't really help, it's more like I'd like your opinion on something. I'm trying this dance routine, and I want to see what you think." You'd have to be blind - correction- born totally without eyes to miss the blush that rose to Yuta's cheeks. He tried hard to push it down, but it was long since too late. Ugh, why was he so emotionally nearsighted? "Sure Sicheng, I'd be happy to." 

Sicheng smiled and continued speaking, "I know we normally do hip hop, but this is a little traditional." 

"Oh? Well, I'd love to see it nonetheless." Sicheng went to the radio they had connected to speakers, and placed in his CD. He quickly got into place, and the music started. 

The routine wasn't hard, and it used moves that dances are more than likely to have seen. It was short, only a minute or so long, but got to its point. When it ended, Sicheng smiled and gave a light bow. "I know it isn't my best but that's because I have only been at it for a few days."

"I think the main thing is balance, but that is what you tend to mess up on in the beginning. You always clean it up long before performance so I wouldn't worry about it." 

"Thanks. I also wrote out the steps and then numbered them so here." Sicheng handed Yuta a piece of paper and then took an extremely long time putting the CD back in its case, grabbing his bag, and walking out the door. Yuta had said nothing, nothing at all. Not even a goodbye.

Sicheng is sure it isn't possible to be so blind to anyone advancing as blatantly as Sicheng was doing it. Then, his phone rang. It was a number he had yet to save in his phone, but picked it up. "Hello?"

"Did you just give me your number in the form of dance steps?" Sicheng began to laugh, "Out of all the times I've tried to show I liked you, this is the one that caught your attention?"

"Wait, you like me?" He rolled his eyes. "Dear god your dense."

"Well at least I finally caught on. I see you don't have a way to get home, mind sharing a ride instead of the bus?" 

"I don't know? Mind taking me out to lunch this weekend?" The sound of a lock turning from the other end of the line was heard, and Sicheng turned to see Yuta coming towards him. Once he was close enough, he pressed their lips together. "You do not know how long I've been waiting for this. Asshole." Yuta smiled and unlocked his car. "You're cute Sicheng, where would you like the sense boy to take you out for lunch this weekend?" 


	32. Not Broken Just Bent part one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuta loves Sicheng. Sicheng loves Yuta. It should be simple but it isn't.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My favorite sport is angst

Sicheng remembers the exact day he met Yuta. Every moment down to the color of his shoes (which were red by the way).

_He had been walking home from work when it began to rain. See, most of the time Sicheng listens to the forecast, but not this time apparently. It had been sunny that entire week so he supposed they messed up. They didn't and it poured on him. Of course it didn't occur to him to even bring a jacket with a hood just in case. The bus stop to go to his apartment didn't have a cover, so he had to stand there drenched in the rain._

_Until Yuta came along that is. The boy had raised his umbrella over the two of them, a smile flooding his face as he did so. "I'm Yuta."_

_"Sicheng, and thank you."_

_"No problem, I don't mind sharing an umbrella with nice people." Sicheng bit back a bitter laugh. He wasn't nice, not nice enough._

_He noticed the pattern on the umbrella. "Totoro? I've never seen that movie." Yuta looked at him with wide eyes. "What! Everyone has seen it!"_

_"Not me, I wanted to though."_

_"I own it at home, and a few more movies by Ghibli." It was an invitation without being one. Neither boy would go the step to make it so, why Yuta wouldn't do it was something Sicheng wouldn't know for some time. The decision was placed on Sicheng's shoulders. "I don't have anything to do in two weeks. Saturday."_

_"Well I don't believe I have anything either, but I'll check my schedule and we'll see. Here," Yuta pulled out a piece of paper and a pen. The bus pulled up and the two walked into the vehicle that thankfully had a roof. As the two took seats next to each other, Yuta_ _quickly scribbled his number and gave it to Sicheng. "My number should something have to be changed." The other nodded and smiled._

_He didn't save Yuta's number, but you can believe he remembered it when he saw it light up two days later. Apparently he had something a Saturday two weeks from then, but nothing next Saturday. Sicheng agreed before his brain caught up to him. 'Don't fall for him,' it said, 'He will never like you'. But Sicheng didn't listen to them and he ended up watching movies all night. Laughing and crying, smiling and looking at the boy who would soon steal his heart._

 

_They were at Sicheng's apartment, they and a few other friends held a small party for Sicheng's birthday. The others had left and the two were cleaning up. Sicheng had just thrown away some disposable cups, when he turned around he saw Yuta looking at him. But not how he normally looks at Sicheng. He was looking at him the way Sicheng wanted him to but wanted to avoid at the same time._

_Yuta was looking at Sicheng like he loved him, like he was seeing him for the first time in years and that he never wanted to let him go._

_Yuta must've known that Sicheng knew how he felt, because he walk towards him. Sicheng's brain screamed at him to tell him to stop, that this would only end in flames. But he didn't stop him. He let him hold him in his arms, he let him kiss his cheek, kiss his lips. He let him curl next to him that night._

_And it didn't hurt at all._

_Sicheng didn't trust love, not after it beat him black and blue. He held it down and it broke his will to ever fall in love again. He never looked for love, and Yuta wasn't expected, but he ended up along with him. He allowed himself to be loved for the first time in a long time._

He and Sicheng have been together since then, almost a year now. Now his brain was getting the better of him as the two shared their bed. It told him that Yuta wouldn't stay with him, and it was always going to end up that way. 

He could've sworn Yuta stopped holding him at night because he didn't want to be near him. Sicheng knew his happy time with his boyfriend would run out. The time they spent together was shorter, and the way Yuta looked at him now, Sicheng knew was because he didn't care anymore. Who could blame him? Sicheng wasn't the type of person you could ever be with for long. This time, it wouldn't hurt as much since he knew it was coming. 

For some reason though, he couldn't bring himself to end it first.


	33. Please don't go (not broken just Bent pt2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuta loves Sicheng, and he will never stop. He just wants things to go back to how they were.

Yuta thinks Sicheng is the best thing that has ever happened to him. Sicheng is more beautiful than anyone he's ever met inside and out, and Yuta tells him that every chance he gets. 

The beginning of their friendship was hesitant, neither of them knowing how to move it in any sense of direction. Until Yuta kissed him that night. And that was when it began. This spiral into love that neither could control but really didn't want to. 

And now Yuta is scared he might lose him. 

Sicheng is a mirror and Yuta is seeing himself in him far too often, and it's becoming bad ways. Sicheng went from this shy worried boy who didn't know who he could trust or love. Now, Sicheng was bright and happy and still shy but that was okay. Yuta loved Sicheng and doesn't want anything to go back to how he says it used to be.

There was a time that Sicheng was always bright and happy. Before Yuta and before everything. He was outgoing and loud, always there for people, and had a lot ahead of him. Then one person ruined it all. Sicheng won't tell him his name, because then Yuta might be arrested for assault. Because when he had the courage to tell him, Yuta wanted nothing more than to hurt him how he hurt Sicheng.

He manipulated Sicheng into loving him, then hurt him. He broke his heart and left scars on him. And when Sicheng was at his worst, he managed to bring him lower.

And when the dust had settled and Sicheng finally could walk away, he was limping. 

Which makes it odd to him, that he'd allow Yuta to be with him. They were different in that way. Sicheng kept his heart guarded and Yuta's was open for the world to take and break or love. Sicheng had only been in one relationship, Yuta had been in many. Although Yuta only broke hearts. Never on purpose but that's all he did.

Every time he was in a relationship, they broke up with him and pulled the  _it's not you it's me_ line. He always thought it was really him. One of those times, it might have actually been the other person but he never let himself think that. It was all his fault no matter what. 

And this time he knew it. It was funny to him, how two broken people ended up together.

Sicheng would always come to him if something was bothering him, even if he wouldn't tell Yuta why he'd let him hug his figure. But recently he would cry in the bathroom or leave the room entirely when Yuta questioned him.

He sleeps farther from Yuta now, curled in a ball away from him. And Yuta has stopped trying to come closer, he doesn't want to get hurt again.

Sicheng seemed to be hurt every time he was around Yuta, but Yuta doesn't know what he did. He misses shy smiles and loving hugs. He wants to fix it. If that means breaking up with the one he loves, as long as it makes Sicheng happy. 

So one day while they were eating lunch together, he put his fork down and softly asked. "Can I talk to you Winko?"


	34. Us (Not Broken Just Bent pt3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuta and Sicheng talk, figure things out, and move on in life.

Sicheng stopped.  _'Oh god,'_ He thought,  _'He's going to break up with me."_ He held his head up. "Yes Yuta?" 

"What did I do wrong?" This was not what Sicheng had expected. "What?"

"What did I say or do? Tell me and I'll take it back and make it up to you no matter how long it takes."  _'You can't tell him. You'll look like an idiot. Do you want to be remembered as a stupid boyfriend? Tell him you want to break up with him. '_ But that isn't what came out of Sicheng's mouth. Instead he said, "I messed up." When Yuta's face didn't change, the voice racked his head.  _' Dumbass. Of course you did. You put yourself in this relationship. '_

"I put myself in this relationship." 

  _'This is because of your mistakes wasn't it? You could've never been good enough for him. You should've ended this a long time ago.'_ He should have, since all he ended up with that pain and hurt in the end. "I should've ended this before it started. I was never good enough for you and I never would've been."

When Yuta's eyes looked like he'd been stabbed, Sicheng and the voice in him hurt. "No no. You have been nothing but good to me since I've met you. Don't apologize for my mistakes. Now please, tell me what I did. How did I hurt you so badly you can't even struggle when I'm around? Why I can't hug you anymore." 

It was silent. Then, "I don't want to burden you with me." 

"You telling me what hurts you isn't a burden. I consider myself lucky since you trusted me enough to talk. I love you Sicheng." 

_Lies, all lies. Who could love someone like you for long anyway?_

"You're lying aren't you? Who would love me for as long as you are without getting tired?" Yuta was silent again, his face becoming unreadable. "Is this my Sicheng talking or the voice that hurts my Sicheng?" His heart stopped. He rarely told Yuta about the voice that hurt him. The voice that comes out sometimes to ruin him. 

"Because my Sicheng knows that I will never leave him, for he is far too beautiful and far too precious. That I would drop everything if he ever needed me. Because I love him more than anything. So is that Sicheng here or is it the voice?" He looked down, in fear that if he looked at Yuta the thoughts would come.

But they were silent, and Sicheng had his voice again. "I thought that you wouldn't want me anymore if I showed anything. I didn't want to make you think I'm worthless or things like that."

"Is that why you kept yourself away at night?" A soft nod. "Do you still want to break up?" The answer was quick, "No. I don't, I just thought it would be better and you would be happy."

"You make me happy, I care so much about you," Yuta used his hand to raise Sicheng's face to him slowly. "I know you're scared. And I'm scared too believe it or not. I can't help but think that I'll mess up. I keep worrying every second that I've screwed up with you." Sicheng shook his head again. "You couldn't hurt me, and if you did it wouldn't be on purpose."

"You know that now?"

"I always know, I just sometimes don't remember." Yuta smiled, "Well just run to me and I'll find a way to remind you," The older linked their fingers, "Pinky promise." Sicheng kissed his nose. "I love you."

"I won't forget it."


	35. Story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sicheng tells Yuta a story as he sleeps

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR 4,000 READS WHAT THE HECKITY

He's sitting at the chair across from Yuta's bed, his love sleeping peacefully across from him. "Lazy boy." He sighed. Yuta was such a hard sleeper. "Let me tell you a story, you know it but this time the version I know. One day there was this boy with dreadlocks fresh into college. He was walking across campus with a coffee cup in his hand when suddenly a boy ran into him. Luckily, the cup was empty. The other boy however, he believed he had spilled his coffee on the ground. He began to apologize so much, even offered to get him another one after classes. Now any other time he would decline and tell what really happened, but this was different. This boy, was the hottest boy he had ever laid eyes on." Sicheng laughed to himself, wishing Yuta would awaken and laugh with him.

"And that boy became my best friend. He was sweet and funny and maybe a little stupid but that's what I loved. It didn't take me long to realize I loved him so much, even if I wouldn't get the chance to date him. But after a year of simply friendship, the final day before I went to visit my parents, he pressed me against the wall and told me  _"Dong Sicheng, you are by far the most beautiful creature I have ever known. Please tell me you love me back."_ And I'd be the biggest liar if I said anything other than that. So when we came back to school, we were inseparable. Well, more than we were." He smiles and pulls out his phone and scrolls through his camera roll.

"When we spent spring break together for the first time and we thought my mom was mad. But in the end she was so happy and thought you were the most adorable person ever. How dare you steal my mom? She loves you more than she loves me. Then for our 2nd year ananniversary you drove us to the beach with a cute bed and breakfast. Then, on our way back..." He stopped for a moment to collect himself.

"It wasn't your fault. We were so close to being home. He was drunk when he rammed us from your side. He didn't try to do it but we both got hurt. I was just lucky enough to heal. You... you haven't yet but you will, you have to." Sicheng walked to the bed. The monitor beeping steadily telling that Yuta's heart rate is steady. "Please Yu-yu. Fight it. I don't want to live in a world that you don't exist in. I don't think I'm ready to do that." He grasped his boyfriend's cold hand. 

"Try. Please, please, please. I don't want to be without you." He feels tears threatening to fall, and he knows he should go. He doesn't cry in front of Yuta. He kisses the hand and lets it go. "I love you." Sicheng walks out the door, asking any higher power out there to save his love. 

Hours after Sicheng had left and the nurse was simply checking on Yuta, his left hand twitched.


	36. Rewrite the stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuta was different than normal people, but that doesn't make Sicheng love him any less. In fact, it makes him love him more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Character difference: autism

Yuta was Sicheng's everything. No matter what they went through, he loved him. He loved him even though his mother said he shouldn't date someone "Not able." Yuta was able despite what his mother said. Despite what many people said.

Yuta was all things good put into one person. Like he always made up the bed, even Sicheng's side if he forgot. He was very practical when it came to picking out their... well entire interior scheme. Everything matched the walls and floor.

He knew easily what made Sicheng laugh the hardest. And thankfully Yuta was the easiest to surprise.

_"Where do you want to live Yuta?"_

_"Not California." Sicheng raised an eyebrow, the two had lived in Cali since they were children. "Why not."_

_"My mom doesn't want me do live near her, and your mom doesn't like me." He sighs, something he picked up from Sicheng. "My mom likes you."_

_"Not really. Since we aren't friends anymore. N_ _ow we are more than that."_

_The other hugs Yuta from behind. He would have to be blind if he didn't see Yuta pick at the skin around his nails. He let's him for a moment, then clasps his right hand. "Nuh-uh. Not for too long. Anyway, other than not California where would you like to live?" Yuta was silent for some time. "Hawaii. Because it's beautiful and far away from California."_

And with a lot of saving and working and searching, they finally ended up in Hawaii. When it wasn't tourist season, Yuta was in love with it the most.

Yuta had this type of kindness that could go unmatched. He was a bit clueless sometimes, but it was only ever under good intentions. 

_"Are you Dong Sicheng?" Was what the woman said when he knocked on her door. "Yes, is Yuta still here?" She nodded and let him in. Sicheng walked up the stairs and picked the only room with a sign on the door 'Chenle'. He opened it and saw Yuta and a boy about 11 or 12 sitting on the bed with math problems scrawled out. "Yuta..." Sicheng said softly. "Yuutaa?" The boy Sicheng is presuming to be Chenle repeated, and Yuta looked up. "Sicheng! This is Chenle. I help him with math homework on Tuesdays and Thursdays but he has a test next Monday and he asked me to help him. I know it is Friday but he needs to study." Sicheng nodded, "Yes but it's eight thirty love."_

_"I know," He begins to pick and the skin around his nails again, "S-Sicheng, he's like me. But he keeps telling me he has to pass the test or the kids will laugh at him."_

_"H-Him?" Chenle repeated. "He can't speak English very well but he can write it. Also he speaks Chinese! The version you speak." Sicheng smiled. **"Hi Chenle."**_

_**"Chinese?"** _

_**"My family is from China."** _

_**"Pretty flowers."** He laughed softly. He saw Chenle's hand flick the underside of his jaw.  **"So what school do you go to?"**_ _He watched Chenle flick faster. **"I know, wait. Wait. Wait!"** He used his other hand to pinch the skin on his arm. His eyebrows furrowed, and Yuta held his hand. "Don't do anything to yourself that you wouldn't do to me." It made Chenle stop trying to pinch himself, and the flicking slowed. "I have to go home now."_

_"H-Hoome? Yyuuttaa!" He grabbed the other's arm. "Hey... you wanna walk me to the door? You don't have to be scared, you will do good," The "Hey" being something he picked up from Sicheng. A word that calmed him. Chenle shook his head. "Then I'm going now. Bye bye." Chenle let go of Yuta's arm. He smiled brightly, "Bye bye! Bye bye Sicheng!"_

**_"Bye Chenle!"_ **

_"Sicheng he remembered your name! That's super good because he couldn't remember my name for a long time," Yuta said once they got in the car. " And his mom said she thinks I'm helping him be normally when he learns. I'm sorry for staying late and not telling you. I forgot and when I did remember you'd know where I am and-" Sicheng cut him off with a kiss._ _It was a thing with Yuta; he spoke fast when he was nervous or scared. As if the action would make the moment pass faster._ _"Hey, slow down. I'm not mad at you my love. I'm proud of you."_

_"Proud?"_

_"Of course. You going there and helping him for that long is good." Yuta smiled and kissed him again._ _There was something about kissing Yuta that gave life to Sicheng. Yuta loved being kissed unless he was having a "hard time" as Sicheng put it. "A monster's form" is what Yuta said, and Sicheng hated when that's what he called it. He wasn't a monster, he didn't need to call himself that. Yuta doesn't experience the same things the same way, that's it. But only few people actually understand._

Of course, Yuta wasn't always with just his little quirks. Just because they are often happy, it doesn't mean they aren't without troubles. Sometimes they would be easy to fix, and other times not.

_It was bright outside. Too bright for Yuta and both of them knew it. If it was too bright the cars were too loud and everything else too distracting. Their car was in the shop, so they were walking. They were walking from the grocery store, and Sicheng was praying that they would make it at least to their neighborhood where everyone knew about Yuta._

_He didn't get that luxury however. As he was leading the way home, suddenly Yuta stopped. "No... No..." He said lowly, looking past Sicheng. "Come on baby, we're almost home."_

_"No. No. No." He knew he should've brought the other's sunglasses. Sicheng gripped his hand tighter. "Yuta. Come on." He didn't yell, but his voice was firm to try to ground Yuta. It didn't work, he ripped from Sicheng's grip and placed his arms at his side, dropping the groceries he had in the bags. He squatted on the flats of his feet on the sidewalk and covered his ears._

_People were walking on the sidewalk. People saw them._

_Sicheng would like to say he didn't ever care what people thought, but that would be a lie. He didn't always care, but this was not one of the times. They were looking at Yuta, then looking at him. He wanted to yell at them, "Move along! He's a little different but it's not like Jesus came back!" But he couldn't._

_The worst part was when Yuta heard a car honk right in front of them, he backed up to the side of a building and screamed. If people weren't already staring, they were then. Sicheng closed his eyes and willed himself not to get mad. He's had a hard week, but he remembered Yuta was the last person to take it out on._

_So he squatted with him. Sicheng lowered himself to where Yuta was covering his ears. "No no!" He didn't stop him from yelling no, just glaring at everyone who passed that even gave them a thought._

_It took a long time, even in Yuta standards. It took even more time to get Yuta to let him move closer. "Bright... too loud. No please make it stop." With his eyes clenched tight and his hands over his ears. "Do you want me to call Johnny and have him pick us up? So you won't have to see people or hear cars and it won't be bright? Then we can go home." Yuta nodded. It only took five minutes for Johnny to pick them up. Yuta spent the car ride with his ears covered and eyes closed. It was better than having him pick at his skin or scratching until he turned red._

There were never times Sicheng doubted his love for Yuta, but times when he doubted other things.

_It was a lazy afternoon, Yuta watching t.v and Sicheng in their room doing nothing but thinking. Thinking about his relationship. He loved Yuta, but sometimes he would get exhausted. Like he couldn't give Yuta enough care. He didn't know if he could ever be good enough._

_Yuta wasn't the best at reading or understanding other people, but since Sicheng's been in his life since forever, he can read him perfectly. Even subtle hints can be picked up, whereas if anyone else tried they'd fail. But Sicheng couldn't always know how to save Yuta before a meltdown, or bring him back from one. He didn't want to hurt his boyfriend because he loves him too much._

_He felt like he wouldn't be enough, and that Yuta will break_ _without Sicheng knowing how to put him back together. A_ _nd the thought stabbed him so badly his eyes watered and overflowed. Sicheng cried silently and leaned until his head hit the board of the bed. Then Yuta walked in. He didn't speak, so Sicheng didn't either. Yuta went to the bed and wrapped his arms around Sicheng's waist and laid his head on his chest. Sicheng continued to cry, and then Yuta began to. It was a thing, where if he sees an emotion he doesn't register, he'd repeat it. He understood sadness, just not from his boyfriend._

_"It's not your fault." Sicheng said softly, running his hands through Yuta's soft hair. "You mean it is but it isn't. How can something be my fault but not be?"_

_"That's how things work sometimes. It means I'm not mad at you." Yuta looked up at him, "I wish you were. It's better than being sad at me."_

_"I'm not sad at you either." Yuta sat up. His hands moving from his waist to drape lazily around Sicheng's neck. The younger brought his head down to meet his own in a kiss. "I am happy at you in fact," A peck, "So happy." They kiss for longer, Sicheng nipping at his bottom lip. Yuta tugs at the hem of his shirt. "Off... off." And who is Sicheng to say no? Because for the time being, he had no doubts about being enough for Yuta._

Sicheng remembers all those times, because they make them. They make up the relationship the two have. The good and bad times, the sad and happy ones. Right now they were looking up at the ceiling. "I'm sorry Sicheng."

"What for?"

"Everything. For being the way I am and making you love me in spite of the fact I'm a freak."

"Hey," Sicheng looked him in the eyes, "I don't ever want to hear you call yourself something as horrible as a freak. You're beautiful. And I don't love you in spite of the things that make you different, I love you with them because you wouldn't be the Yuta I grew up with if they weren't here. They make the amazing boy I'm lucky to have."

"Lucky?" Yuta picked at his skin. "Don't do anything to yourself that you wouldn't do to me. And I'm so lucky to have you. You make up my whole world you know." Yuta didn't reply, but Sicheng knew he heard. "The stars are pretty tonight aren't they?" Yuta said, yet he never glanced out the window. "But you're my favorite star." Yuta caught the hidden meaning and laughed. Then attempted to push Sicheng out the bed.

They weren't a picture perfect couple, but Sicheng wouldn't want them to be.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I enjoy this form of Yuta and might dive into it in the future...
> 
> And of course; if I've incorrectly written Yuta please let me know. I based him on my experience with someone with autism but my wording might not have been the best.


	37. Humans are Space Orcs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sicheng enjoys learning about Humas. That is all.

_September 24th, 2017_

It has been a year since I have been on this study mission. Yuta is a good housemate, humans as a whole are quite interesting and intelligent. I was worried they would be like Quon, unwilling to evolve but humans seem quite far with what their planet gives them. 

Today Yuta took me to a place called a "Park". I do not think many people noticed I was Neocult, as we do look extremely similar to humans. There were animals like dogs (I mentioned them a few reports back. Very hyper things. Domestic ugly wolves, but good.) Insects like butterflies, just smaller sinprees really. And in their water, swimming were birds! Yuta told me some were called ducks, and the other were geese. He also said geese were quite mean sometimes, but failed to let me know which was which. So the one called geese seemed to be very angry. He chased me! And Yuta laughed! I do not understand human humor at all!

_November 3rd 2017_

I now understand their humor. There was a "Petting Zoo" today. I have recorded what both those words mean, and it sounds exactly like what it is. Yuta told me it was for children, but then he saw Mark and Yukhei. He rolled his eyes to the sky, and said "Never mind." I do not know what he was looking for in the air. There were many farm animals, and this one I love called the goat. Apparently it will eat anything. So when I asked if Yukhei was by any chance part goat he laughed. (Although I do not see at all what was funny. He also has large eyes, it is not my fault!) 

Then while we were petting it, it pushed Yuta. It was quite the entertainment since he wasn't hurt. It was so funny that I began to turn shades of pink! I skipped purple entirely. I've never felt like that.

 I helped him up of course, and then he told me he no longer enjoys goats. Although the goat was kind to me. I love goats now. 

_December 26th_

The holiday they call "Christmas" has come back. It was my second time experiencing it. This time however, Yuta did not do anything special at first and said he would have no one to celebrate with him. His friends were celebrating with their respective family, and I was to return to mothership that was in orbit so I could give my oral report. I do hope you all forgive me for postponing it for another human month. 

When Yuta heard I was staying, he got quite happy. If he could change his pigmentation he might have became purple. I did not know how much joy the season brought with itself when you celebrated it with someone. Yuta and I did a good amount of holiday things that I did not do last year. I found out that gingerbread men are not living even if you put them in the oven. (That's story was very misleading. Yuta told me that people do that in stories. It is impractical and confusing.) I shall see you on 15 days from now.

_Feburary 28th 2018_

Apparently Yuta has a friend who is 4 years old. She was born on February 29th, but there was no February 29th this year. Yuta explained every four year this month gets an extra day to keep up with Earth's revolving. I suppose it is far too late in their existence to change the calendar. It is quite unfortunate they will have such a short lifespan. 

**Extra reports: Yuta has informed me that people born on leap years live as long as other without any outside forces. Cancel my last sentence.**

_March 11th 2018_

Today was the first day I saw Yuta really angry. I have seen him pretend to be mad, but never actually angry. I was going to ask him something but he was busy.

He was on the phone with someone, he was already off when he started talking but then got worse the longer the conversation went on. Eventually he began to yell. I have never seen Yuta yell like that.

He hung up very angrily and was about to throw his phone when I ran and grabbed his arm. It is lucky Neocults are stronger than humans, or I might have not been able to stop him. I expected Yuta to try again but instead he put his phone down and hugged me. "Am I a bad person? I know your species is very bad at lying so don't try." I would have no reason to lie. So I reply, "If I believed you to be a bad person I would've asked to switch observations." Yuta hugged me tighter. "Thank you."

"Who said you were a bad person? I will show them the evidence in my reports that shows just the opposite." He laughed at that. "This person made his mind up on me about two years ago. I don't think your evidence will help." He seemed very sad after that and was quiet for about an hour or so. He hugged me a lot after that. I did not ask, for I have seen humans do not always enjoy being asked about their problems.

And off the record I do enjoy hugs from Yuta.

_May 4th 2018_

Yuta was sad today. I saw him sitting at the couch at around 1:54 a.m. I was awake because I needed to use the bathroom. He was crying, and his phone was on the coffee table. He keeps his voice quiet, but I can here him anyway. I think the person who made him angry is the same person now. I sit by him and open my arms, allowing him to hug me. He accepts and is wrapped around me for a long time.

When he is finished crying, he looks like he wants to explain himself. As if he needs an explanation for me to want to make him feel better. I let him tell me that it was some of his family that didn't support the fact Neocult were inhabiting Earth and Visa versa. And a member of his family that he used to be close to only berates him now and it made him feel worse than usual.

So I asked if I should change to a different household. Yuta quickly said no, and that he enjoyed me being near him than anything. When I expressed my worry that his family will hate him, he said it would be worse without me. I believe Yuta truly care about me and I care about him. I will need to discuss something with you the next time we meet.

_June 19th 2018_

Yuta took me to a beach. Why is sand even real? It seems very inconvenient and gets everywhere. I hate it. I cannot fathom why anyone would want to go here. Not only does the sand get everywhere, it also gets very hot! I could not even take off my shoes. (Yuta told me majority of the humans call them  _sandals_ which we do not wear.) 

The water was also a problem, as it was full of salt. People do this for fun... Personally I believe this could be a very good torture method, but cruel and unusual punishment is illegal. I shall bring this sand back, and perhaps we could replicate it and use it on only our highest offenders. 

On the topic of water, it was so full of salt I couldn't even open my eyes fully. My second eyelids had to stay closed, or they would have burned. I stayed longer than desired of course, because Yuta enjoyed it. As he has housed me for over two years now it is the least I could do. He did buy me the green apple flavoured snow cone I have taken a liking to, and held my hand.

_July 5th 2018_

Something has happened between Yuta and I. I do not believe it was a bad thing however. Yesterday was the American holiday of their independence. A tradition is to bring friends and family together and cook good food and celebrate. We went to Yuta's friend's house and stayed in the backyard and living room where there were many people and even another Neocult. She seemed a tad younger than me, her name was Gia.

Then when it became very dark, fireworks went off and we gathered to watch them. They were not coming from our backyard, but maybe somewhere farther down. As they came down above us he and I looked at eachother. Something happened inside of me, like a spark. He leaned closer to me. It was like one of the scenes in human movies. I do not report on my feelings, but I feel like this is quite important. There are many feelings I have for Yuta, and all of them lead my pigmentation to turn pink without time to will them away. He kissed me softly for a moment and asked me, "Was that okay." I nodded. (On a note; they ways humans show affection is similar to us.) He kissed me longer after that, and kissed me again today. This is a good change.

_September 24th 2018_

I would like to thank the council for their kindness. Thank you for accepting my decision and meeting Yuta. I have told you that he is quite sweet. I am happy to be staying on Earth and honoured to be the first Neocult to do so. My reports will still come in on each Earth month and there will be updates on anything deemed important and/or urgent.

 Oh, and Yuta would like me to tell Councilwoman Lucres that you are more likely to be ran over than be eaten by a shark and that the ocean is fine.


	38. Snap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So I saw that infinity war will be released on dvd

When Sicheng woke up, he saw that Yuta was gone. He was probably in the kitchen, getting breakfast ready since he tends to do that on weekends. Sicheng saw his phone vibrate, it was Taeyong. "Hey hyung"

"Oh thank god," He was crying, "I didn't know if- if you would pick up."

"Why wouldn't I pick up?" Taeyong was silent. "Tae. Why wouldn't I pick up?"

"They lost." 

"Who lost?"

"The Avengers, they lost to him." Sicheng's voice hitched. "What does this mean for us?

"Where's Yuta?" 

"In the Kitchen." Sicheng said unsteadily. He didn't hear any of the signals that cooking was happening, nor did he hear Yuta humming. "Sicheng. Are you sure?"

Sicheng grabbed his phone and ran into the kitchen, then the rest of the apartment and ended up in the bathroom. "No no no. Taeyong, Taeyong he's gone. Why is he gone!" He slid down the bathroom wall, holding the phone close to his ear.

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know? Jaehyun works there!"

"Jaehyun is gone too! I've called everyone. You and Chenle and I are all that's left. All I know is that there was this big guy and bad things would happen if they lost. The Avengers lost and people are missing."

"How is- how is Chenle?"

"He's sleeping. His parents and brother are gone and he rode his bike here. He said things were crashing and that so many people are gone. It happened in the middle of the night here so we didn't know. He said he was awake when it happened, they got in late from a family thing when they turned to dust. He passed out from fear, and when he came to came here. He's messed up pretty bad, he won't talk. We all are messed up." 

"But where are they? If he won what's gonna happen to us? Are we going to die too? Where are they where's Yuta I need Yuta. I can't-" He began to sob. Everyone was gone. He'd be alone again. He can't be. If not even they could stop him nothing can. He began to go into hysterics when Taeyong started talking. "Focus on my voice. You are safe Sicheng. I can't leave Chenle alone but can you walk here?"

"I-I think I can. Don't hang up, please."

"I won't I promise."

* * *

On his way to Taeyong's house, he saw the aftermath of the battle. Crashes, people in disbelief. Some buildings were destroyed, and he even saw someone's hand under rubble, still moving. Sicheng ran to it and started lifting the pieces he could. "Taeyong, I'm hanging up, I need to see something."

"Call me back right."

He used all his strength to lift the rest of the pieces. When he lifted it he coughed let the dust settle. His eyes were half open and he was covered in dust torso up save for where tear lines would've been. There was a cut on his arm and a long on near his neck. "J-Jeno."

"S-Sicheng?" His voice cracked. "I'm not too hurt, but I'm stuck. C-Can you-" He didn't even finish his sentence when Sicheng pulled him out. "How did you survive that?"

"Renjun pushed me out of the way of a crazy car before he disappeared. We were just at a late movie and we were gonna go to our homes. Then people started dusting, and when he saw a car headed for us he shoved me and then h-he became like them. I fell into a pile of rubble and more fell casing me in. But that doesn't matter, what is happening?"

"I don't know, but people are turning up missing. I'm going to Taeyong's, we'll be better there. **"**

"Taeyong's still here?" Sicheng nodded, "He and Chenle. I was on the phone with him, do you want to talk to him?" Jeno nodded, then hugged Sicheng. "Sicheng did they lose? This would've only happened if they lost."

"They lost, but we have to try and keep going. They may have lost but maybe not as bad since we're still here. I'll put Taeyong on the phone." He knew it was harder on Jeno and Chenle, to accept that the Avengers lost and in this fashion. Both of them had grown up even more than Sicheng with them saving the world and the belief that no matter what the world was safe. Jeno had even seen Black Panther once just last year. When the people you depended on for mostly your entire life can't even save you, who can? He could see it in Jeno's eyes as he was on the phone, a daze. Like if maybe he didn't believe it, this would all go away. Sicheng wished it worked like that.

* * *

 

"Oh god." Sicheng said when Taeyong opened the door for him. Taeyong's eyes were red and puffy. Lines formed by streams of tears visible. Sicheng fell into his open arms after walking inside, barely having strength to take off his shoes.

Taeyong then hugged Jeno. "I'm going to start the shower, I know you don't want to be covered in dust the rest of the day huh? Then you can go into the room Chenle is staying in, it's the third from the bathroom. I've got extra clothes in my room." Sicheng could tell he was trying to keep it together for Jeno.

He and Sicheng sat on the couch. "Y-Yuta he's gone. Mark is gone, Renjun is gone, everyone is gone. What is happening? What is-"

"Shh," Taeyong said softly, sitting him on the couch, "I don't know what is happening and I don't know why. B-But I know that if we're the only four left then we have to take care of eachother. I called your parents, they're safe."

"What about yours?" Tears fell down his cheeks. "They're with Jaehyun now." This time it was Sicheng who held him in a hug. They cried together, and Sicheng didn't know if he'd ever be okay. He was praying that this was just a bad dream; that he'd wake up and Yuta would cook breakfast, and Jaehyun would tell them about aliens and other things that were classified but no one ever told anyone else about. Taeil would tell his bad jokes and Lucas would tease Kun. But he knew that it wasn't the case, and his world has ended.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will I ever give a part two to this? Probably when infinity war pt2 comes out.


	39. Keep Running

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spring is the season Sicheng loves the most.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey hi I'm not dead and ily guys who stayed around

Sicheng smiled as he made his way up to the roof of the building. This was probably illegal, but he doesn't care. Yuta was up there, so he had to go. 

He opened the hatch Yuta had told him about, the only one that wouldn't result in an alarm going off in the building. From a sensible standpoint, they should really get that checked out. Sicheng however is not someone currently in a sensible standpoint. He climbs and pulls himself up. And like Yuta said he would be, is standing there. 

They don't speak, just looking at the city of Okasa in its blackout in the night below them. Somewhere in that time, they link hands. "This place really needs to up their security." Sicheng says, and Yuta laughs. 

"Good thing they didn't tonight." Sicheng hummed in reply. Sometimes Sicheng wonders if he's been in a sensible standpoint since he's met Yuta. 

_"Are you okay?" Sicheng asked after toppling over someone. He had white hair, and bounced up almost immediately. They were both going on the crosswalk, but different directions and one of them was running. It was not Sicheng. "Yeah I'm good."_

_"Why were you running?"_

_"To get places faster." Sicheng rolled his eyes, and they crossed to their respective sidewalks. He turned back to Sicheng. "You coming?"_

_"I've got things to do."_

_"No you don't. I can tell. Come on, live a little." There was five seconds on left, five seconds to make a decision._

_And Sicheng has never run faster in his life._

That was two years ago, and they're still running. Not from anyone or anything, but for the heck of it. Yuta is the amazing heir to the will of his grandfather. His rich grandfather. His rich grandfather who left him almost a million dollars when Sicheng had met him. And back then, Sicheng was just a kid who wasn't in college, could never find anything that he wanted to do. So they decided to run.

Yuta was looking for fresh air as he called it, a breath away from his family and their desk jobs. Of course, he was taking a very long breath and he'd keep inhaling until he felt like it. He wanted to see places and be something. Make at least one person's life happier each place he went. They haven't had a proper home or a good hot meal in a long time, but it's okay. They've had each other. 

Yuta never told him where they were going or how far it was, and Sicheng loved the surprise. Going from Seoul to Thailand and simply living for a little. And then going to other places to see things, sights that are nowhere else in the world. 

Sometimes it's too much for Sicheng though, never sitting still for long. It's like he can't get attached to anything or he'll miss it too much. He's found places he loves that he wishes they could've spent a little more time at. But Yuta can always tell when Sicheng fell in love with the places, and then he'd take him back. And eventually, he got to buy a camera with him when he found one he really liked. He loves the pictures almost as much as the places. Sicheng felt his already big heart rearranging to make room for the world, and Yuta. 

"I think I'm scared." Yuta says softly. Sicheng looks at him, but doesn't say anything. "I've been running for so long, I'm scared I will be running forever. I love it, don't get me wrong but sometimes I wonder if I have been doing it for too long. And sometimes you get a look on your face and I know you don't want to run but you come with me anyway and I hate that."

"It's because I know you'll go without me. You were already doing this without me, I'm just along for the ride."

"It's been two years and you don't know yet? I need you Sicheng, so much more than you need me. I don't know why I run when you hate it. For that I'm sorry." Sicheng laughed, but it wasn't a humorous one. "I don't hate it. I could never hate it. I just wish we didn't have to run so fast when there is no one chasing us. You could exhale this breath you've been holding." Yuta shook his head, "I don't think I'm holding it anymore, I don't think I've been holding since I've met you." Sicheng's mind stopped, taking in the words. "Then what are you running from?"

"Because I don't know- I don't know if I remember how to stop."

"Do you want to stop?" He shook his head again. "I don't feel like stopping, but what about when I know I need to stop and-"

"When that day comes, I'll be there to help you stop. You're not running from anything remember? We can find a place that we both like, and then I can help you. The world isn't going anywhere, we can keep exploring it. As long as I'm going through it with you. I'll run the entire world if you bring me. I need you just as much as you need me." Sicheng moved and held him. Yuta accepts it, even leans into it. "Do you think I'm really living? Even if I do all these things, am I really living my life?"

"You've asked me this before. Do you love what you're doing?"

"All the way."

"Then I truly believe you're living." They were quiet, Sicheng enjoying the peace and warmth. "Sicheng... do you think  _you're_ living your life and not just walking in mine? That I'm not letting you live?" The silence again was different, but short. "I love what I'm doing. And I'm not walking in yours, I'm running beside it." Sicheng let him go so he could look at him. "Sicheng I-" Sicheng hugged him, cutting him off. "You don't have to say it."

"But I need you to know."

"I'm running with you and stayed running for this long, that should be enough. We need each other and that's okay. If you believe that I'll do this with you as long as you want, then I know you finally can understand me." Yuta didn't say anything back, there was nothing to say. Sicheng always said what was needed to be said. Okasa was beginning to turn back on, and it was in their best interest to get off the roof. They may speak on this again, they might not but it didn't matter. They'd always remember the words they said and the things they meant. And they'd remember the words that went unspoken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really liked this one guys. I want to make a lil miniseries about how Yuta started this and how he and Sicheng fell into this love they have, what do you all think?


	40. Note 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sicheng and Yuta ended up in Hawaii. Takes place before the night in Okasa

There's something about the beach that Sicheng loves. Something about the ocean being right there in his grasp. Close enough he can feel it but far enough that he doesn't fall into it.

It's late, very late. Or really early depending on how you look at it. Almost 2 a.m to be precise. There was no one on this side of the beach, it was too dark to see the rocks that could hurt you if you made the wrong move. Luckily, he brought a flashlight. It was a little cold and the ocean spray wasn't helping. But he wasn't about to go back in the hotel, he needed to think. There was a lot on his mind, more than he even cares to think about tonight. For now he'll focus on the things that are pushing at him more than others. Certain things about his life, like things that kept distracting him, and decisions he's made and where they've led him and the whole angsty lot. So now here he was at the smoother part of the rocks after the dangerous batch in a pair of thin pants and a black sleep shirt contemplating life.

He hears and then sees Yuta, his own flashlight in hand. "You should come back in, it's late." Sicheng doesn't know how to explain to Yuta his thoughts in a way that makes sense outside of his brain, but he doesn't feel like he has to. Yuta hands him a little jacket, and he puts it on just in time for the spray to only bite him a tad bit. He knows Yuta wants to know, not even looking at him he can tell that his silence is carrying weight. But he'd never press, it was an unspoken rule between them to never bring up the past unless they wanted to. Yuta's past was a bunch of questions that Sicheng didn't feel like he needed the answers to. The life Yuta had before he ran into Sicheng was a life rarely spoken on. Yuta didn't like it and Sicheng didn't need to know. His heart was with Yuta, and Yuta was with him.

He felt like maybe if he spoke, it would make a little more sense. "My mum called me, two days before we got on the plane. She said that I was wasting away the gifts I had hiding with you. That she misses me. Then she apologized for what she said a few moments after, and said that she just wants me to do something that would mean something in the end. Then that she loves me and doesn't want me to leave behind nothing." Yuta nodded, than spoke. "I can take you back to Korea in the morning, I could take you back to China if you wanted."

"No," Sicheng moved closer to him, "I like this I like spending time with you and seeing things I'd never see otherwise."

"But she doesn't."

"I'm an adult Yuta. I don't need my mom to make nor do I need her to agree with my decisions. If I want to stay I'll stay, if I want to go I'll go."

"Do you want to go? Like really want to? I won't be hurt if you say yes, I know I move too much sometimes." Sicheng sighed, Yuta hasn't asked this before, but Sicheng can see it lingering behind every time they leave somewhere Sicheng particularly likes. "It's a rush, this running we've got going on. It's new and a little scary but also I love it more than anything."

"Even me?"

"You know the answer to that," Sicheng felt Yuta lean against his side. "Yuta, what are we running from?" This time, Yuta sighed. It was heavy and held something, sorrow, perhaps. "I thought maybe if I ran around the world a few times I could come back to where I started and be ready to never have the life I had again. Slow down and continue the work I've been left with. If I've seen everything then I have no reason to say I wish I went somewhere when I've already been." 

"Then never go," Sicheng whispered as if this was something for their ears only, "Never go to the work you've been left with. Give that to someone who wants it." They both know that whatever it is that he is supposed to take over, Yuta wants little to no part in it. Sicheng wants Yuta to be happy, and he's happy now. But he wants Yuta to  _stay_ happy. "Come on," Yuta says, linking hands with Sicheng, "You'll get a cold if we stay out here any longer." The world outside of their running was a reality neither of them wanted to face, and for now wouldn't have to. Eventually they would find themselves back at their own sea thinking about that world again with Sicheng's ocean of thoughts almost drowning him. But tonight and for many more nights they would simply curl up together into a tangle of limbs, and sleep. The outside world that the both of them didn't want to go back to for a long time would not harm them, as long as they aren't in the outside world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I really enjoyed writing about Yuta and Sicheng running. So I decided that it would be a little ongoing thing. So every time you see a chapter that has Note _ with a number, it's part of this world!


	41. Forever is a Long Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I was thinking, what type of world do I have yet to do? And then I had an idea.

_I don't understand why you insist on us writing letters to one another. I am sure one of us could call for the journey to be arranged that one meets the other. Nonetheless it also tires me to wait for you response my love. I look out far across the land and wish to see you, for the only glimpse I get is the one in the single portrait of our families nearly four year pass._

_My love is only for you, Sincerely Sicheng_

 

_My dear, I insist because I am perhaps a young boy with love of the old. Believe me, we will see each other soon but do you not believe it is quite beautiful how even our carrier pigeons know the path by heart and love as we do? Your script is also very beautiful, like the person it flows from. Be happy you have that portrait, I only have the one from five years in which we both had godawful garments and our too small crowns on our heads. I believe that was more than an accident to dress us so._

_Yuta_

  _My Yuta I swear you enjoy my suffering. I could just as easily ride Antigone to your kingdom borders and you can ride Creon to mine. We are not betrothed to any woman or man in our kingdoms or respective neighboring kingdoms. In fact, we are our closest neighboring kingdoms. Our time is coming soon for the both of us to choose someone to wed, and you know very much how I'd like for it to be you. When the day which we both will be crowned king arrives, our kingdoms could most definitely be combined. Ask to wed me at any moment and without a thought I shall say yes._

_Your favorite, Sicheng_

_Sicheng, we are both far too busy with schooling as well as learning the duties of being future kings to have any sort of marriage come soon. As for combined kingdoms? Our borders near each other are already a tad bit meshed, it feels like we are one kingdom already. Do not worry, when the time is right I promise that I shall take your hand in marriage and we will live happily. Forever I will stay by your side._

_Your Yuta_

_I didn't know Creon was allowed to fly on his own. As I was walking the streets of my kingdom, simply as a commoner does I saw him. He seems to have grown bigger since I last saw him, his scales are brighter also. If I had known, I would have had Antigone out to greet him. The kingdom is bustling around fall as it always does. I shall be 22 and you 24, it will be quite the celebration. And this time you can finally see me again. To save you the ink, no I have not dyed my hair as you would like me to. I will not under any circumstances ever change my hair colour. You will never see me in the same colour as pollen no matter how beautiful you think it shall be. Be healthy and safe._

_Sicheng_

_My love, please do not tell me it is true. There has not been talk of war from your kingdom and the Meyrie in generations, not even your grandfather was born when a war came. They have no business with you all. Do not tell me you must leave to fight. This must be why you have not sent me a letter in months. Do you not want to face me? Please come and let me see your loving eyes another time before you begin to battle._

_Winko, my truest love please understand that I do not want my last glimpse of you to be one with you in pain. My heart would only be mourning the happy boy I love that I have led to him disappearing. When I think of you, I only want to think of the kind boy who has made me laugh all these years whose hands I wish to hold once again and then forever. And the reason you have not heard a single breath of this is because the last we want is your kingdom involved when it needs not to be. The Meyrie will never understand our bonds with creatures from the lands beyond our own we only call the Moors. They believe that we are to leave all contact and care for them and then take it over. The creatures, fairies and trolls and dragons like Antigone and Creon can never be overtaken so they come after us; the ones who wish to live among them. We are closer, if we do not hold them back you will very much so be next._

_I deeply regret not wedding you before, but I promise you that I will. The first day I return home and have greeted my mother who stays behind, my other mother with a lineage of knights is who I will be beside during battle. I shall already be on my way to your kingdom to take your hand. For now however my love, it will be some time before I have a chance to send you anything._

_No matter what happens to me, you will forever be the one I care for, your Yuta_

_Yuta! Do not speak like that it scares me. Never let me think someone so horrific could happen to you. Do not tell me you wish to wed me and then that you may never return in the same letter. If the gods are truly over the kingdoms of good and right, then you will return safely. As future king I command that you return safely. You may not read this but I shall send it nonetheless._

_Fight well, Sicheng_

_My dear, I have gotten the gift you had desired to give me. My birthday has been just 3 days past. Your kind messenger, Jaehyun sent it to me early this morning. I'm sure that he took up the task rather than Doyoung this time to see Taeyong. The two of them do spend quite the amount of time together whenever they stay around. Anyway, I did receive your gift in perfect condition. The crown is beautiful, the navy blue crystals remind me of when we went to the lake so late at night years ago and I confessed my love to you. It is also very delicate seeming. In fact, if I did not know any better I would say you were giving me the crown I would wear on my wedding day. But that can not be true, because you are very much going to come back to me. I shall give you the crown I had made for you, and I shall wear yours._

_Be safe, Sicheng_

_Ah my love, spring is nearing and winter has finally passed. You tend to laugh at me because of my low tolerance to winters of snow and ice, but you did not spend your childhood in the moors near fire spirits. The coldest I experienced was cold water. They were quite nice to me, despite your preference to ice spirits. Perhaps they are the reason you have changed your hair colour from it's brown to a grey purple of sorts. Around this time you would under normal circumstances beg in letter after letter for me to change my hair, claiming it would look beautiful in this spring weather._

_I try my hardest to write as though you've never left and that you will see these soon. Your mother, Queen Himiko will most likely read them. So I will not be allowed to write all of the things that I tend to write to you. (They will make her blush so strongly I will never know how to face her again.) The spring celebration will come soon, and we were supposed to celebrate together for the first time in a long time. As per tradition in the years in which the most spirits gather by our borders. Did you know we are the only kingdoms this side of the west where the spirits and creatures from different divinites can all reside in harmony? Our moors are very special in that way, I can already feel the presence of Antheia, Demeter, and Qu Yan. Well, I'm sure you do truly know that, you are in fact fighting for them._

_I love you so, return to me, Sicheng_

  _Do you remember the first day we met Yuta? Ah we were just children but I find it very important. Imagine if we had met a year earlier or a year later, how much different would this all be. If we met a year earlier, my father would have probably put me under the study of your council (thank god the leader was found of treason, he was horrible if I do say so myself) and I still wouldn't have seen you often for they rarely leave their quarters. A year later, and I would have been betrothed to Princess Miro of Tinlai. Luckily we met each other simply when we were just of ten years of age._

_Mother and father used to tease me so often when I was a child. For even then, I dreamed of weddings. Can you believe it, ten or eleven year old Sicheng who loved so many things as a boy should, also dreamt of dancing with the one he loved. Back then however, the face of who I danced across the floor was one shrouded in black. Now, when I dream that same dream it is you._

_I love you, your Winko_

_Happy 25th birthday my sunshine, that is all I can bear to write to you on this day. I love you._

_Sicheng_

_I cannot write this with false feelings of happiness behind it any longer, so I shall spill them into this single letter so I may not have to ever again._

_I miss you terribly. How much I do can never be measured, because it changes every day. In two years, I have suffered without you. Some days I do not feel as bad, I can go on with my days and tasks simply and lively. I will talk to nymphs or let the younger male dryads attempt at winning my favor when they know you already have mine. Sometimes follower spirits of Malgohalmi will appear in the rocks and sculptures to hear me sing. Other days when my heart hurts too much to bear I take Antigone out and ride her high into the sky. I do so until she makes a grunt that let's me know I'm going to fly too close to the sun if I continue. And then I let go of her restraints and I fall. I have to do something, anything to remove the feeling of loss and fear I have. She catches me of course, but I just need to feel something other than pain._

_I visited Queen Himiko recently, she is handling this strongly as a queen should. She rules as if nothing happened, but I can see what's going on in her mind. Her only son and wife have left to fight in battle and she still carries a strong face. She treats me as if I am her son, as she always does. Her Majesty also commented on my crown you gifted me with, I have worn it every day since it has been in my hands._

_Forgive me, but I asked her if the crown was my wedding crown. You would be the type to give that to me as though I'm never going to see you again. She denied my suspicions thankfully, but agreed with my reasoning. She says that she hasn't even seen the crown, for you keep it under lock and key. Apparently you have been working on it since I confessed. It makes me worry, when the time comes will my crown to give you even be nearly as beautiful? I have had yours made for some time. You however, finished maybe three years ago. Your castle seems distant and empty without you._

_I hear the end of the battle is nearing, return soon my love! Sicheng._

_I have done it. The thing I never wanted to do. I have coloured my hair that pollen colour. How dare you manage to get me to do so without you even being here. You're going to love it, as even I quite enjoy it. My sister is awaiting your return almost as much as I am, she loves you more than she loves me. Quite boyish that little girl is. I swear every day that she is acting like a man even more, she will end up tricking a woman into being courted by her. I would not hold it past her, she refuses to dance with any man unless it is me or father. You influence her far too much._

_On a different note; I Prince Dong Sicheng of Neoc swear to Prince Nakamoto Yuta of Tecul that if you come back safe I will finally reveal my very long and very stupid full name. Sicheng._

_My love it has happened! I have heard the news that you have won and are on your way back as we speak! However, this is a two weeks early letter and it will be some time before we see you. Nonetheless I am proud of you for commanding and leading armies and fighting for what is right. Three years is short in war time but still feels long. Read these, every one I sent so you can know what has happened in recent times._

_I love you still, Dong Ricress Jia Ren Minxu Sanfai Nyle Nunne'hi Sicheng. (That hurt to write, please never call me any of these other than Dong Sicheng)._

_My beautiful love. How I've missed you so. I'm sending this two days ahead so you can know I am on my way. I will bring my heat and soul to your castle for you to finally be able to take. Things will be different and I will be near from now on. I am ready to hold you, love you, and finally marry you. Hopefully, one day, we can rule as one kingdom by one another's sides. (Although I have already heard talks of this, it seems that we are not the only ones believing in unification.)_

_See you soon, Nakamoto Yuta who doesn't have a million names._


End file.
